As Uwe is sacked, who’s next on the sausage train ?

Well that all came out of nowhere. Whilst we’ll get to Brentford (and begin the Wolves preview) shortly, along with another new idea for Lionel Road, we can only begin at Leeds United where former Bees boss Uwe Rösler has been shown the door by Massimo Cellino. In his place, Steve Evans jumps straight from parting company with Rotherham United to becoming the Italian’s sixth head coach in 18 months.

You couldn’t make it up. Uwe, who had previously struggled with a doomed Wigan Athletic before being relieved of duties, didn’t stand a chance given the controversial owner’s previous track record. And now, just 12 games into his new career at Leeds, it’s all over. The FA followed this up by promptly banning Cellino from running his club after being found guilty of another tax offence.

But just when it couldn’t get any crazier, a 2013 quote from Evans began doing the rounds. For anybody who has had his or her head in the sand for the previous 24 hours, it’s below.

Evans – now on a rolling contract at Leeds (add your own punchline)

We all say things that we ultimately live to regret but this is a whopper. Even more bizarre is the line, “I want to be the captain of a Cruiseliner, not The Titanic”.

By what stretch of the imagination could Rotherham United have ever been considered a Cruiseliner? A pedalo, perhaps. We all know Evans loves shooting his mouth off but even by his standards this one was odd.

Given his vociferous personality and Cellino’s ‘no-nonsense’ approach this is either going to be the ultimate stroke in managerial genius or the Italian will be looking for manager number 7(seven) by Christmas. I’m betting on the latter option.

Will Steve Evans find it ‘plain sailing’ on his new Cruiseliner?

As for Uwe, what next? He left Brentford in a great position to return North where, sadly, things haven’t gone to plan. The Bees kept going without him whilst we all know what happened next at Wigan and now Leeds. Supporters are already muttering about him coning back but I think that Cruiseliner has long since sailed.

Much as there is emotional familiarity there, the club kept going without him. I’ll be eternally grateful for the position he got us to but it was Mark Warburton, with the backing of Matthew Benham, who was ultimately able to make the big step.

Then again, but for that penalty…. (hey, it’s been a while).

Back in West London, the development squad recorded an impressive 3-2 victory over Crystal Palace. Moreso, considering Brentford were 2-0 down in the second half. However, a Montell Moore effort and two Sam Saunders goals in injury time (or ‘Autumn’ as its known on the training ground) were enough to complete a remarkable turnaround.

Mark Fuller catches the moment on the official club site

The win is great news, but even better is the thought of Sam Saunders returning to such imperious form. One thing the team has been crying out for is the sort of flair and enthusiasm brought by the likes of Sam and Jota (thanks, Dougie).

Whilst Charlton Athletic on Saturday is probably a bit too optimistic, could we see him back in time for an appearance in the QPR game on Friday week? What a time to come off the bench that would be.

The main reason we are talking about all of this is because the Wolves game, originally scheduled for tonight, has been put back 24 hours. Us football fans are very much creatures of habit and to play midweek on anything but a Tuesday feels somewhat odd. It shouldn’t but it does.

Much like when we lose the toss and the opposition does the sneaky trick of making us swap ends so we kick ‘the wrong way’ in the first half. It is a situation that rarely ends well (go on statisticians, prove me wrong) and leaves me feeling less than comfortable.

On the plus side, it means the players have had a bit longer to recharge after Saturday’s win over Rotherham but will it make a difference? For those of us not going, Mark Burridge, Ciaran Brett and Mark Chapman provide the Beesplayer comms. Where we can find out.

And finally, Lionel Road. Whilst we are still awaiting that photo of Mark Devlin and Matthew Benham leaning on shovels as we finally ‘break ground’, discussion around the stadium, and how it will look, continues. And overnight, the possibility of the Brentford monorail has risen from the ashes once more.

By possibility,I mean in no more form than just my own warped imagination where a photograph of the St. Pauli sausage train crossed my social media timeline. Whilst now, sadly, defunct, back in 2010 the VIP seats at the German club were served by this most special of train services.

The St.Pauli sausage train has, for now, been suspended

Running every five minutes from the club kitchens, it brought hot bratwurst to those in the top seats. Presumably, to be washed down by the individual beer pumps at every chair.

If Matthew Benham is reading (you never know) how about something similar at Lionel Road? What finer way to have your pie served than without even having to leave the seat?

At a time when we are looking to make the new ground that little bit different (and the ‘hot seat’ idea is already one that has previously met with approval), how about it?

Nick Bruzon

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Matthew Benham and Roy help lift the mood as Gibraltar are bracketed.

Very much a day of mixed emotions yesterday as former Brentford goalkeeper Wojciech Szczęsny (now plying his trade with Arsenal) kept Gibraltar at bay in their EURO 2016 opener against Poland. And by kept at bay, I mean barely had a look in as the boys from the Rock were on the wrong end of a 7(seven) – 0 bracketing.

Despite an even first half, it ended up being the sort of rout that nobody likes to see. It took Brentford owner Matthew Benham, who had earlier given a positive reaction to the ‘hot seat’ idea for Lionel Road, to fully lift my post match gloom with another view of one of his favourite football headlines.

To read the rest of this article, season 2014/15 is now available to download onto Kindle (and other electronic reading device) in full. Containing additional material and even some (poor) editing, you can get it here for less than the cost of a Griffin Park matchday programme or Balti Pie.

 Thanks for reading and all your comments over the course of the season. For now, I need to make more space on the site for any follow up. However, ‘close season’ will continue in full, further along.

Lionel Road plans form as Gibraltar arrive on the Euro stage

No sooner had Brentford fan (or not, as it transpired)Cameron Diaz broken my heart this week than an idea has formed which could help bring her back into the fold. First, though, EURO 2016 qualifiers and if you aren’t bothered seeing Germany get brackets (seven) against Scotland then Sky Sports 3 has Gibraltar making their tournament debut on Sunday night.

The boys from The Rock have a ‘home’ fixture against Poland in a hugely significant game after finally becoming UEFA’s 54th member last May. I use ‘home’ loosely – the game will actually take place in Faro, Portugal – but it still promises to be an emotional experience for players, travelling supporters and those watching on TV.

It is a shame, from one respect, they’ll be rattling around a half empty stadium when a trip from Gibraltar to London would likely have been just as cost effective (thanks to the wonder of charter flights) and would have seen any number of stadia up for the task – international football at Griffin Park, perhaps?

But I digress – in a Group D that also sees World Champions Germany, the Republic of Ireland and the pool minnows, Scotland, it could be a fascinating qualification campaign. The smart money will be on Germany to walk it, of course, but I’m backing Gibraltar to pull off a shock this evening. And at 33-1 with some bookmakers for the win, worth a few quid…..?

Getting back to domestic matters, this week Cameron Diaz declared that although she wasn’t aware of The Bees existence, now that she is she’ll look into us.

As such, what better chance for the club to spring into action? To be quite honest, when it was announced last week that she’d be in London on a promotional tour, I’d have assumed the marketing and media chaps would have been all over it, anyway.

A new home shirt with ‘DIAZ, 9’ winging it’s way to her? A tour of Griffin Park? Perhaps an interview with Chris Wickham for Beesplayer?

But, it’s not too late. One thing I discovered whilst writing last season’s columns/book was an interesting fact about Swiss football. Whilst most people know that the home of domestic side ‘Young Boys’ is the ‘Stade de Suisse, Wankdorf’ what you may not be aware of is a unique feature – the, so called, ‘Hot Seat’.

The stadium has a solitary red chair amongst the other 31,999 black and yellow ones. It was the first one installed in the new ground (opened in 2005) and you can’t buy a ticket for it. Instead, a notable personality – usually linked to the club – sits there.

I love this idea and, as I’ve said before, think it would be fantastic if Brentford could try a similar scheme at Lionel Road. 19,999 red and white seats, and then one in a unique colour – or perhaps even yellow/black stripes?

In our case, the occupant could range from a deserving supporter to a local dignitary or ‘celebrity’ fan. (If nothing else, there’s a free programme article out of it every week).

And if we go down the latter route then what better guest to invite to use this ‘hot seat’ than Cameron Diaz? As Paul Davis told me on Twitter, “At least now we are on her radar”.

Mr. Benham, if you are reading (you never know) then how about it?

But even if Cameron does come good, she’s still down (down) the pecking order behind Rhino out of The Quo or Dean Gaffney.

Should Diaz be replaced on the celebrity Bees montage?

Nick Bruzon

From Brentford to Al-Wakrah; Wolves to the Wankdorf

New stadia seem all the rage these days.

Hardly a season goes past without a team leaving its traditional home to move to a new ground. Indeed, as Brentford prepare for Saturday’s League One clash against Wolves, there is probably as much interest in matters ‘off field’ as those on the pitch. Hounslow Council Planning Committee is, of course, due to discuss our proposed new stadium on December 5^th.

I may be biased but I think the Lionel Road plans are great. Primarily because they feature a design that actually seems to have, and say this in hushed tones…. some character. Contrast the exciting schematics to the usual five seconds thought that most modern architects put in, the net result of which is an identikit bowl (see: Derby, Leicester and Middlesborough for starters).

Moreso, it won’t – as things currently stand – have a sponsored name. These are very much in vogue and range from airlines to food-processors as is the case, respectively, with Arsenal’s Emirates or Wolves and their Moulinex ground.

To read the rest of this article, season 2013/14 is now available to download onto Kindle, in full. Containing previously unseen content, you can do so here for less than the cost of one matchday programme.

 Thanks for reading over the course of the campaign. For now I need to make space on this page for any follow up.  The ‘close season’ / World Cup columns continue in full, further on in this site.