Tag Archives: Kitman

Harry nails new kit. Hollywood walk of fame or shame?

17 Jul

Friday was Brentford kit launch day. It should have been the most exciting date on the calendar. One to rank with 13th August when the Bees walk out against Arsenal or perhaps even the moment which will see one North Stand observer finally marry his beloved in a few weeks’ time. For clarity, not Buzzette.

Buzzette – still got it!

Yet the pressures of work meant that, sadly, any excitement (or otherwise) as the new designs dropped had to be parked. There was no flurry of over excited tweets from this self-proclaimed Kit nerd. Indeed, social media was barely touched so I can’t account for Luis. Yet now, the laptop screen has been slammed shut firmer than a transfer window at the denouement of deadline day and we can take a more considered view.

Boom. From nowhere they appeared. The days of Mark Devlin’s strip tease are long gone.  A 7(seven) day preamble of brief flashes before the full reveal – the kit rather than our then chief executive.  Instead, without warning it was with us. Much like an ‘emergency’ episode of Mrs. Brown’s Boys when the originally scheduled programme has to be cancelled due to an over running news report / football fixture, it was in our faces with no time to prepare. Home. Away. Goalkeeper. But what do you think?

The Brentford 2021/22 Umbro shirts are here

In a way, the enforced delay from yours truly has probably been no bad thing, in hindsight. I may not have been responsible for my actions. And not in a good way. We have a new sponsor – Hollywood Bets – and being blunt, gut reaction to the logo was that it looks horrific. A jarring clash of a graphic and their colour scheme no way to replace the otherwise absent traditional black trim on the Brentford shirt. Moreso when you see how lush the mocked up versions from Jamie Maison on Twitter look . Oh Fullers, wherefore art thou? 

What might have been….

The plus points are that stripes are bang on. Quantity and thickness. The red is a great shade and striped arms are great. I’m also a sucker for a round neck collar so top marks there – even if the two tone colour scheme is a missed opportunity. All white would have been immense. The Bee logo on the back of the neck is another lovely touch. 

As for the away version, this is the initial pick of the bunch. Buttercup (apparently) yellow with black sleeve trim and badges, a v-neck and the sponsor (whilst still jarring) seeming more blended into this design. Then there’s that subliminal diamond motif shading within the kit itself. It is, and I quote, “An eye catching design”. Not my words Carol, the words of Brentford official. Who could disagree?

Umbro are up there with Hummel in my favourite kit manufacturers and so I’m, personally, thrilled we have them for a third season. At least. Then again, I do need to get out more. Yet until New Balance take over – and I get a monogrammed shirt for the price of a regular one – we couldn’t have a better technical sponsor.

David Raya will be wearing all green. His shirt features “A pixel graphic sleeve and tonal crew neck”. This time, a design described as “Exciting”. 

Pixel perfect?

Take your pick. Something for everyone? Whilst perhaps not up there as an all-time classic, that’s less to do with Kitman Bob and the kit design ; more with the marketing team and our choice of commercial partners. Money talks and all that. It’s not even a case getting snotty about betting companies – we’ve had 888, Matchbook and LeoVegas before so the ship has long since sailed about the ‘evils’ of gambling. It’s just that on the initial reveal it looked awful. 

Perhaps it’s just me. Perhaps other love it. Do you? Perhaps time will ease the pain on the eyes or it will look much better in the flesh. I was privileged enough to see the amazing brown/orange for real before that was revealed to the world and have to say that it knocked my socks off. Up there with our best ever. The reaction from others on seeing the pictures first was, we could politely say, the opposite.. Perhaps, the same will apply here. 

Let’s not be stupid. I’m still going to buy one. As Mrs Bruzon said last night, “It’s The Premier League shirt”. Plus the first 1000 through the door when it goes on sale next Saturday (a club shop exclusive launch prior to online sales ) get Premier league badge printing for free.

Yet as Harry also said to me, “Dad? Where are the black bits?”.  And his child-size kit, presumably bereft of sponsor, will have none.

The Jaffa cake – up there with our best, ever.

As one, final thought…Might a dip into the Umbro back catalogue and the laced necks of the early 90s have been another alternate to the trim colour / collar conundrum? Just saying…..

Kitman Bob, he writes what he wants. A week before destiny.

3 Jun

Brentford are in the Premier League. Repeat. Brentford ARE in the Premier League. If the Bournemouth play-off semi-final was immense, Saturday at Wembley against Swansea was next level. I’m still smiling now. Then, when it couldn’t get any better, it did. The chance to share the build up from inside the Bees camp arrived, courtesy of none other than the legend that is Big Bob Oteng. 

Our club Kitman and all-round Bees’ hero has collected his thoughts from the end of that epic encounter with The Cherries right through the build-up to Swansea and the final whistle at Wembley. A sneak-peak behind the curtain of just what went on and just why we won. But written in his own quite wonderful words.

Over to you Bob. A week before destiny. In his words…. and pictures.

Saturday.

It’s 4:55 PM and we’ve just won 3-1 in a game that had everything a football fan could wish for. As long as you’re on the winning side that is!!

The players have done the usual applauding of the fans in every section of the ground and I follow behind after making sure the old footballs were present and correct in certain sections. I’m greeted with the obligatory ‘Big Bob’ song !

As I enter the dressing room there seems to be different vibe and I mean a totally different vibe to a dressing room that has just won a football match. Brian Mbeumo give us a little speech prompted by Thomas who then brings the room to a silence, says one more and then retreats to his office. As I head back to the kitroom it’s the first time in these play offs I allow myself to start thinking of lions on the new shirt !!!

Monday

I arrive at the training ground early Monday morning, 6.40am. Thomas is already there which in itself isn’t unusual but there are a number of other coaches also present. Something big must be happening !! 

During the weekend Wembley emailed requesting how I would like the dressing room to look. I put in my request and they reply “is that all” as I can see  we are in the East as we were last season. Also during the weekend I’ve had countless DM messages from fans requesting to know what colour keep we will be playing in. This continued throughout the week until the reveal on Friday. As the team finishing the season in the highest position, we get choice of kit colours.

What I had done previously on the Saturday evening was to ask all the Brentford players what they wanted to play in. Each one of them just said RED & WHITE. David wanted his favourite amarilla.  It was such an air of confidence when they all said it.  I more than anyone knew about that red/white supposed curse on teams at Wembley. Last season I pushed for blue, now I just felt it could be time for the curse to be  broken and banished to history by the BEES.

Tuesday

Thomas had already told the players that he wants to build up to Saturday to be like an ordinary week. For the last two days nobody had really discussed what happened on Saturday because we were all there, we all witnessed it and there was a quiet air of confidence at Jersey Road.  

On a Tuesday before a Saturday game is when I start to prep the match kit for the weekend but this was no ordinary game. I had to apply NHS badges to each playing shirt,  to show gratitude for such a wonderful service that has served us all through such difficult times and not just during the last 18 months. Also new sleeve patches showing PLAY-OFFS.

As I prepped all the outfield players kits I started asking myself which one will get us to the promised land? Even a last-minute David Raya header would be welcome. They all will, as that’s what good teams do. The nerves are now building !!!

Wednesday

WELL EARNED DAY OFF FOR THE  PLAYERS !! However, I had to be in as new tracksuits and polo shirts are being delivered for the big day,  ( no white suits )…

Thursday

Today was quite relaxed for me. I’d prepped all the kit Tuesday / Wednesday and now I was waiting for the final squad to be confirmed or any additions from Saturday. 

I walked over to pitch 2 with a hint of curiosity and I have to say the boys looked absolutely on fire. Not sure whoever we are facing are going to be able to contain them for 90min.  Bernardo was walking the boys through some new set pieces For me Saturday couldn’t come soon enough.

Brian Riemer confirmed the squad was as per Saturday. As we chatted in his office, he asked me what I think will happen, (déjà vu took me back to the same question last August. I said then we will win, but when I say it now I truly believed it. All based on the previous Saturday).  I did my final checks and left Jersey Road with such a nervous feeling inside of me. Two more sleeps !!

Friday

Friday was a late report. 2pm for 3pm start.  Thomas had gone round to every member of Jersey Road staff requesting that they be on the training pitch for 3:45pm precisely. At 3:40 all the staff slowly ambled from the pavilion across to  pitch 2. Training was still going on ( patterns of play) – looked very nice these patterns !! 

Training over ran. Brian, Thomas and Kev drilling down certain instructions to the squad.  Once it finished, Thomas called over all the staff to join him with the players. We all formed a massive circle – it was actually the circumference of the centre circle. Thomas stood in between Pontus and Christian and delivered a speech that would have got me ready to play tomorrow. Two VIP coaches arrive at 4pm, we have a light snack and everything is loaded and we depart for the Hotel (dinner 7pm).

I keep my routine the same. Ring home and speak to the family. My little man is excited,  he actually predicts that Vitaly would score, (his favourite player). Myself Manu and Bernardo have usual Friday away night Spanish ritual (sobre la mesa). To discuss the next day and life over the table. We started it Friday night before Preston away.

SATURDAY THE DAY !!

Especially on away games I like to get up by 7am and go for a walk before breakfast. On my walk I passed a bar called The Hive. I also have lots of thoughts  about my friend Rob Rowan, I’m not really one for superstition but 95% of me thinks today is going to be our day !! 

The usual bus ride to the stadium is replaced by myself Peter G, Sladey, Joe N, Lorna walking the 500 yards to the entrance to the stadium. We pass the Hive then, as if my magic, we are met by big Shaun. Big Shaun is the main security tunnel steward at Lionel road, now I’m convinced todays the day.

We arrive at the stadium 10:45am We walk round which seems to be underground beneath 90,000 seats. So many people in suits all directing us in the right direction. If it’s your first time at Wembley you can be in awe. There were so many white sky OB trucks, it looked like a flock of flamingos at a watering hole.

The dressing room looks magnificent. It feels different to the last year. I set the players up in a totally different formation. Pontus likes to sit in the corner of any dressing room but this is going to be hard to achieve as it’s shaped like a horseshoe. 

There are two dressing rooms with a smaller one for the staff. I take 10 minutes to have a look around and have a look outside. I begin my favourite part of my working day (apart from a win at the end) ! By 12:30pm I’m happy and everything is done. 12:45 Mike the Swansea kit man pops in to have a catch up. We both have a laugh about not going to each other’s respective stadiums next season.

The players arrive at 1:15pm.  I sit in the corner of the staff dressing room playing word search on my phone,  Reidy wants a change of socks, then it back to word search. I’ve done 5 levels on my word search game and then it’s time for the warm up. The dressing room looks the same as it does on every away game. Sliders everywhere. Emiliano’s sliders always in the centre of the room. I’m sure it’s a thing with him. 

The nerves are kicking in now and I try and find work to kill the time. The boys come in, do their rituals pads on shirts on then it’s huddle time.  Christian delivers an emotional speech and again I wish I was going out to play.

The first 45 minutes for me are the best in 25 years. I can remember it all which is very rare for me. At half time the boys are really calm. Thomas is calm. All the messages are delivered in a calm way and I know that today is our day. I’m so confident I didn’t emerge for the second half until the 92nd or 93rd minute. Those last two minutes went really quickly but at the final whistle I went over to Mike and wished him commiserations. I run onto the pitch to join the huddle and just started jumping around. I don’t remember much after, hence I’ve watched the game back in full twice and the celebrations countless at times on social media. Also all the pictures will be sent at some point.

This day and this season I will never forget both personally and professionally. It has sunk in for me because I always knew the at one point during my time with  Brentford we  would reach the promised land, and I am so grateful and privileged that I was a small cog in the wheel of this wonderful bus stop in Hounslow about to join the premier league express !!

Bob Oteng

Move over, Marcus. There’s a new ambassador in town.

24 Oct

Brentford are at Stoke City today. Move along ; nothing retrospective to discuss. We’re 7th in the division and have two wins from two since picking up again after the International break. Ivan Toney is on fire – braces against Coventry City and Sheffield Wednesday have stormed him to the top of the Championship goal scorer charts – and the Bees are buzzing (groan). But off pitch, the talk was all about kit. Primarily, our new third kit. My word, it looks like it’s going to be awesome. And Kitman Bob has something special – if you are quick….

Friday evening saw the return of Marcus Gayle and Stu Wakeford in The Warm Up on Youtube. You can catch it further below. Of course it had all the build up for the Stoke game and the retrospectives on Coventry and Sheffield Wednesday.

We had Marcus paying his previously earned forfeit  – filmed singing ‘Hey Jude’ in front of La Rosetta (It’s a little Italian restaurant. At Brentford, err, high street). Whilst wearing a bumble bee costume. There was also a catch up with Tarique Fosu and some ‘old school’ FIFA action. If action is the right word as the Megadrive classic was dusted down.

But let’s not pretend there wasn’t one real highlight – the sneak peak at our new Umbro third kit.

Oh. Wow. This could be something quite wonderful. The glimpse of the white shirt with red badge and sponsor put one immediately in mind of the St. George sponsored 2005-06 away effort. And that is a thing of beauty.

Yet what really had fans salivating was the sleeve trim – a nostalgic throw back to our first ever kit from 1889-90 in salmon, claret and blue. The briefest of snatches has yours truly already hanging on next week’s formal reveal. What a nod to our inception down at the Brentford Rowing Club as the original club colours have resurfaced.

Could there be a sash? Long sleeves? Further surprises? Come on already. Reaction to what we’ve seen so far seemed universally popular. Kitman Bob has done it again.

And then some…. Did you catch this tweet last night? 

Not one but two of a super limited edition version of last season’s blue and gold special is up for grabs. And there’s no more complex a way of winning it than by liking the tweet. Incredible stuff.

Marcus may be the ambassador but with this and the new launch, it’s Bob who is really spoiling us.

Oh, Bob. With these kits you are really spoiling us..

What else is there to say today? Not much, really. Stoke City await and, personally, I’m going in to this one confident. As ever. But, hey ! Vitaly Janelt has taken to the Brentford team like a duck to water. Along with Mads Bech he really shone at Sheffield, Wednesday. What a shame, in the nicest sense, that it was Ivan who took the headlines. 

This will be a tough test, no doubt. Whilst the table is still in nascent form, Stoke are just one point behind us. They’ll be as full of optimism as we are and determined to consolidate their own position. To take another step forward in what is already looking like it could be one of the most open Championship seasons on record.

The match is, as ever, on I-Follow. £10 gets you access – for those of you not watching it at Lionel Road in the sold out club lounge event. Enjoy ! For yours truly, it’s family time and perhaps a beer. Or two. Whichever way you watch, enjoy. The only way is up. What price on Ivan Toney doing it again?

And until then, why not warm up with The Wa…

Nick Bruzon  

Could this player be a free transfer signing to complete the promotion push?

23 Jun

Saturday was immense. Brentford thumped Fulham (plus ça change) before West Bromwich Albion dropped points. Then it got to Sunday and Leeds United fell apart, again. This time at a Cardiff City side who now find themselves right on the verge of the play-off pack. The only way the last few days could have gone any better would have been an air traffic control strike in the immediate vicinity of Manchester City during the Burnley game. What a bunch of pricks. Something we’re not totally immune to either, going by some of the weekend social media commentary – kudos to Ollie Watkins for saying what he did in such eloquent and restrained style.

On pitch, it really was a chance to see who was going to hit the ground running and who wanted it more. To discover how this mini-season will play out as the run towards promotion concludes in a concentrated burst of non-stop action. Brentford, of course, started at 100mph as Fulham were put to the sword once more. We’ve talked about that one already and whilst it was quite the finish, the points are on the board and we move on. Let’s not dwell in the past anymore. There’s the small matter of West Bromwich Albion coming to Griffin Park on Friday night.

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Fulham – put to the sword

It is a visit made all the more tantalising by not only the Baggies dropping points but the ‘L’ awarded to Leeds United after they went down in Cardiff. Should the Bees make it three in a row on Friday (and a game against the table toppers is no foregone conclusion) then it will see us overtake the Cottagers to start breathing down the neck of the Elland Road outfit. Not that they have any tradition of choking when the pressure is on.

There is the added incentive of those two teams then playing each other on Saturday afternoon in a game which, if ‘automatic’ is a genuine aspiration for Brentford, will see a win for the Michael Jackson fan club as the least bad outcome.

That’s all ifs, buts and maybes of course. Football rarely goes to plan and even moreso at present. The club are doing all they can to make the fans feel as involved as possible. The I-follow is ‘up and running’, supporter banners and flags are being put into position whilst they are even producing a match day programme for the remaining home games. The article for that one was submitted on Saturday evening. All being well the celebratory mood not impacting the quality too much. Hic. Please note: your definition of quality may vary.

Large

Yet despite our engagement, watching on TV is no substitute for being there. Missing out on this most exciting of run ins is desperately sad. We all know and understand why, of course, but it doesn’t make things any easier. I’d love to be there. We’d all love to be there. Never have I appreciated just how much we’ve taken for granted. Those mid-week Autowindscreen games where it was a case of ‘M’eh – can’t be bothered’. Makes you think in retrospect. Now I’d sell the (metaphorical) family silver or the last existing pack of ‘Griffin Park favourites’ Top Trumps for the chance to see us host West Brom or Wigan Athletic.  

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If Matthew Benham is reading, I’ll swap them for a ticket

Last night I took a walk around Griffin Park. I’d been talking to a fellow supporter about Friday’s game and feeling glum at the thought of missing out, decided a stroll around the stadium would help. We only live a few minutes away so why not? People go to church to reflect. A visit to the Bees is much the same  It’s something I’ve done many times before but feels even more poignant now. Our time here is fast running out and every sight of Griffin Park is cause to drink it all in. Perhaps this would help lift the gloom. 

When we lived on Braemar Road you could see straight through the gap in the stand to the penalty box and home end goal from our bedroom window. Whilst that has since been sealed off, perhaps some hitherto unseen peep hole onto the pitch might be discovered? The network of houses and alleyways around our compact stadium might afford a new glimpse onto the pitch for those truly desperate. 

No chance. Sadly. It was all locked up tighter than the Arsenal wallet. Whilst the pitch was still (kind of visible) from the one obvious spot in the car park, expect that to be sealed off on matchday. TV trucks and security guards, quite possibly with Alsatians named Tintin and Pickles, will be the order of the day. There’s no hope of anyone beyond players, officials and journalists seeing anything in the flesh. Don’t waste your time. 

That said, if Thomas Frank is (somehow) reading then perhaps a suggestion. Whilst the squad is looking formidable, perhaps the one area where we are lacking consistent depth is in the category of slightly over-weight 49 year old goalkeepers. As luck would have it, I tick both those demographics, have my own boots and no plans for Friday night beyond watching TV. If he were to make the call I’d reluctantly ditch my family and Sky to join the squad on a game by game basis. If it helped out, of course.  

Failing that, I take a mean photo of pre-match kits hanging up. Kitman Bob, if you need a hand……

Shirt pictures available. Get your free shirt pictures

Nick Bruzon  

Sure, play detective. But this is the real story making football headlines.

10 Oct

And on that bombshell. My word, what a way for Thomas Frank to celebrate his birthday (Sergi’s new contract until 2023 rather than the belated, and obligatory, narcissistic greeting from Ian Moose – my good friend). Whilst the rest of the football world may have been talking about the social media spat – the polite word – between the current wives of Wayne Rooney and Jamie Vardy, over at Griffin Park it was the late afternoon kit reveal that was making all the headlines. Brentford will run out against Millwall next Saturday wearing a special edition kit designed to evoke memories of 1904. QPR tickets have gone on sale and for those of you wanting to catch up on the Kurupt FM takeover against Bristol City last week, this Saturday’s Soccer AM is your place.

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Great news !

However, we can only start with THE big news from yesterday. The story that just about everybody was talking about. Certainly, based on my Twitter feed. The sudden and unexpected dropping of a quite beautiful looking ‘third’ kit which will be worn by Brentford next Saturday.

Whilst Kitman Bob had hinted at something more to come during the pre-season build up, things had gone very quiet after the launch of our home and away shirts. Then, out of nowhere, this appeared yesterday evening.

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My. Word.

Obviously one needs to see it in the flesh but from the publicity stills and video alone, it’s an absolute class 10 /10 effort. My word. It really is stunning. If the current away shirt is special, and it is, all of a sudden it has become second best of this season’s kits next to this. Relatively speaking, of course A thing of sheer beauty and, even better, sponsor free.

The blurb on official tells us that:  we will mark our first-ever victory at our famous old stadium by donning a 1904-inspired third kit against Millwall on 19 October. Produced by Technical Supplier, Umbro, this commemorative jersey features a stylized crew neckline in spun poly fabric with printed tonal blue stripe, a gold woven crest and ‘Farewell Griffin Park’ back neck sign-off.

You can read that in full, here. Likewise, find the link to ordering one of these beauties, the first 400 of which come in a limited edition box.

I’ve no idea how historically faithful it is. Certainly, the blue we wore back then had yellow stripes whilst this one is more two-tone blue. Yet as discussed with one Ealing Road wag last night, it could be Donald Trump’s version of the truth and I’d still hoover it up. Indeed, the order has already gone in – despite the price tag. It is a heavy one this time around and I can well sympathise with those who may baulk at the £60 for an adult or £50 for a child sized effort. Certainly, compared to the prices that we are used to normally. Is this the cost of having a unique and (presumably) limited edition run? 

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We’ve been back to our past before. This, from 2004

Either way, it’s too special and too delicious not to add to the collection. I console myself with the thought that I haven’t bought the home shirt for a few seasons (until this time around) and will just have to lay off the pints before the Millwall game to protect the pocket. It’s a small price to pay. Top marks Kitman Bob. Top marks everyone. I love it !

Enjoy!

Next up, QPR away. Your latest chance to see Yoann Barbet give away another penalty. That’s at least three so far this season – by my counting. Your chance to catch up once more with Mark Warburton who, it has to be said through gritted teeth, has his team doing relatively well so far. Compared to normal form. It won’t last – don’t get excited. 

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I love a 237 derby and, it would be fair to say, we’ve definitely had the lion’s share of the results since our paths have crossed in the Championship. Sure, there’s been the odd slip up but, overall, it is the Bees who have the ascendency with 6 wins out of 9 in league and cup.

Monday October 28th is the date with ‘gold’ and ‘silver’ view upper tier tickets available already, before you get to the ones where you can’t see the away goal. Then ground floor go on sale. It’s always an odd way of doing things but there you go. At prices approaching Leeds United levels (£34 to see a Monday night game that is also on TV? ) you can get these now. 

Personally speaking, I’m all set. The month’s pocket money went in the space of an hour on a new shirt and match ticket. On the plus side, making the not so super hoops try and do Plan A better is always worth the entrance fee. Even if it does require a mortgage.

Finally, Soccer AM. I have to be honest they are two words that normally put a shiver up the spine. Not so much because of the ‘bantz’ but more as a result of the penalty shoot out performance from the Brentford fans at the end of the show on ‘Doncaster’ day. I can’t help but feel partially responsible for a ‘nil point’ performance that in no way was an omen for what came next.

Gibbs shirt on Soccer AM

Soccer AM. Even HB made a first, off screen, appearance

The show is still going. And this weekend’s has all the fallout from the Kurupt FM takeover at Griffin Park on the occasion of the Bristol City game.  In their words, you can see ‘Chabuddy G & the gang wreak havoc’.

There’s nothing more to really add off the back of that. Roll on Saturday. Despite International Break. Enjoy. 

Nick Bruzon

Is this the funniest joke since records began? No. More importantly, will Neal start today?

20 Jul

“She drags me all the way from Billingsgate to Richmond to play about the weakest practical joke since Cardinal Wolsey got his nob out at Hampton Court and stood at the end of the passage pretending to be a door.” Not my words but those of TV’s Edmund Blackadder. And words which have now been surpassed by Huddersfield Town making the utterly predictable reveal that their ‘sash’ shirt was a fake after we were finally treated to the real thing. On matters closer to home, Brentford travel to Wycombe Wanderers this afternoon where there will be more than a passing interest in Thomas Frank’s starting XI.

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Umbro rescue Huddersfield Town supporters. At the second attempt.

Let’s start with Huddersfield Town. Why not? With Brentford fans still basking in the glory or our own Umbro designs for 2019/20, knees jerked on Thursday when the Terriers ‘revealed’ their own effort for the forthcoming season. The oversized sponsor’s sash, promoting a bookmaker, prompting immediate horror from those who fell for it and scorn form just about everybody else. The horrors of online betting. The obvious breach in regulations. The fact that Huddersfield were playing along in a joke at their own expense.

Most crucially, the abject awfulness of the alleged kit. How do you even cock up a sash shirt? This should be impossible, given it’s a universally accepted fact that this is a look which is up there with the very best in shirt design.  That Huddersfield managed to mangle it so badly, at their own expense, whilst simultaneously pissing off almost the entire fanbase is a PR stunt that has well and truly backfired. Except, of course, for Mr. P who has more than earned his pound of advertising flesh. I mean, who wasn’t talking about them in footballing circles?

And then, surprise surprise, it was all revealed to be a hilarious prank. Despite us being nowhere even close to April 1st. To quote Blackadder once more, “I thank God I wore my corset, because I think my sides have split.

On the plus side, the new look unveiled by Huddersfield Town is magnificent. Hats off to Umbro for pulling this one out of the kit bag. They really are on fire this season. Even better, the official incarnation of the Huddersfield shirt has the luxury of being sponsor free. It’s just a shame their fans had to go through all that nonsense to get there.

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Crystal Palace. Vasco Da Gama. Peru. All prove it should be impossible to mess up a sash kit.

Right. Wycombe Wanderers v Brentford. There’s one topic on everybody’s lips. And it’s not whether we’ll be wearing black and yellow. Neal Maupay. Will he start? Will he be here at the start of the season? Have there been any bids? Are we really preparing the way for his departure with the reported acquisition of Bryan Mbuemo from Troyes?

Persaonlly, I take the offerings from sites such as Football League World and HITC with a huge dollop of salt – when it comes to actual facts, they’re normally about as on target as a Murray Jones and Nick Proschwitz dream team. Yet when Beesotted are talking about it (and you can read their thoughts here) then stand up and take notice.  Should the Mbuemo story prove correct, might he even be an acquisition rather than a replacement? Matthew Benham does love to surprise us.

Ultimately, nobody really knows. This is all part and parcel of being a Brentford fan these days. Trust in the long term set up and overall squad balance, tempered with the more immediate angst at the prospect of saying goodbye to any one of several club heroes.

No matter how philosophical one has to remain about the quite wonderful way in which we conduct our business, football is an emotional game. We all love the likes of Neal, Said, Ollie, Sergi, Romaine. To name but a few. The immediate reaction to any combo of them leaving would see us gutted – no matter what comes next. Just look at the plaudits for Yoann Barbet, despite his eventual destination. then again, look at who has signed up at Griffin Park in lieu of him and Ezri. It works!

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Here’s to more in 2019/20…..

So Neal may start at Wycombe. He may be on the bench. It doesn’t really matter in terms of serving up a clue about longer term intention. Unless, of course, the likes of Billy Reeves can get to him after the match and administer a gentle probing so we can hear from the man himself about his own thoughts.

One can dream.

And finally, time is running out on me annoying you about the annual Last Word season review e-book for your kindle, iPod telephone or other electronic reading device. However, with all proceeds received from the £1.99 sale price going to the Brentford FC Community Sports Trust its worth a mention. 

You can download it here and whilst it’s shonky, whilst I’m still spotting typos in it and some of the jokes are almost as weak as The Huddersfield shirt launch, what better way to while away your time on the commute to work, the toilet, holiday or just simply relive some of the exciting moments from last campaign as we wait for 2019/20 to start? If nothing else, it has a whole host of material not previously published on this site. That’s meant as a good thing, by the way.

Thanks. As ever.

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Nick Bruzon

My morning with Bush interrupts one kit launch and one kit ‘launch’.

18 Jul

Clanggggg – the sound of a name being dropped. There was no Last Word yesterday as a previous football related engagement with Absolute Radio (more to follow) meant it was a case of being up, ready and out of the house before 6am – the usual point at which this nonsense is being put together. Which was gutting for this kit nerd given that the previous day had seen the launch of the new Brentford away shirt. Gut reaction to that one is that we have an absolute stunner. On the plus side, it means we have had time to ‘enjoy’ the ‘hilarious’ ‘joke’ shirt launch at Huddersfield Town. At least, I am assuming it is a joke launch – at the time of writing that has yet to be confirmed.

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It is what it says

Tuesday morning had seen these pages looking for a potential ‘away’ shirt at some point this week. Two hours later and it was on us. Coincidence and pot luck rather than anything more sinister at play, I assure you. I hope. Then again, nothing to hurt by writing that I’m fairly sure Neal Maupay will be signing a contract extension in the next couple of days. Move along – nothing to see here. Back to the shirt.

Oh. My. Word. Umbro and Kitman Bob really have hit the jackpot this season. I loved the home version. Our change strip is glorious. Discarding all the usual techno-babble about breathable material, seams, side panels etc etc that goes with these things, we’ll cut to the chase . If for no other reason than everybody has seen it whilst Luis Adriano has dissected this (and previous versions) in magnificent detail already – do look at his piece which you can find here.

Black. Jet Black. Yellow trim. A monochromatic badge. Bee colours. Beautiful. Just beautiful. It’s the first time in a few seasons I’ll be buying a home and an away kit which, given the state of yours truly’s bank balance, is no small claim. We’ve got it wrong or come close so many times but to hit the mark first time out with both shirts is testament to the partnership being formed with Umbro.

One can only imagine what we’ll have lined up for the third shirt which, reading between the lines, IS coming. Kitman Bob’s tweet in response to a question of whether that would be delivered,  suggesting that we enjoy this one first, implies that there is more to come. And definitely not just me reading into this what I want to.

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Great work all round

Talking of Kitman Bob, his Wiz Khalifa clue from earlier in the summer paid out in wonderful style. With fans guessing he meant ‘Black and Yellow’ it was another nice touch from Brentford ‘official’ to title the launch email “Yeah, uh huh, you know what it is…”. They lyrical amongst us / those who double checked on google, just in case (delete as applicable) obviously recognising the opening line from the former Billboard 100 chart topper.

The only downside to any of this is that the ditching of Adidas means we’ve no hope of ever seeing the brown/orange again. Even in the event of a colour clash against, say, Bournemouth who play in red and black. Yet as we bemoaned this sad loss, one Twitter correspondent noted: You’ve just married Helena Christiansen and you’re lusting over Ann Widdicombe?

Personally, I’d say that it was more a case of just marrying Helena Christiansen then lusting over Cameron Diaz. They’re both great. They’re both Brentford. Or are they….

Next up. Huddersfield Town. Yawn. Urghh. Yesterday’s sponsor joke being played at their expense, yet seemingly in full co-operation with the club, has kind of backfired. The obvious knee jerks of disgust were all over social media within nano-seconds. If for no other reason than how do you mess up a sash kit? Surely that’s sartorially impossible?  Peru, Crystal Palace, Vasco da Gama of Brazil have all proven many times how wonderful this design feature can look. 

Then there was the realisation that the size of this logo clearly breached the 250 square centimetre area on the front of a kit permitted for such advertising. The FA have been obliged to step in as we all waste time waiting for the true reveal. I could bang on but, frankly, nobody wants to read about it. The sponsor have achieved their presumed aim of getting people talking about them. Huddersfield, meanwhile, have a short term ‘cult’ classic that is truly deserving of the title: Worst. Shirt. Ever. And given it was worn in last night’s friendly game, could technically now be deemed canon. Even if only for one game. We can all moan about the attrocities at play but the ultimate realisation that people are using the phrase ‘bantz’ to describe what is happening is reason enough to consign this whole sorry affair to the waste bin of history.

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Don’t. Promote. Sponsor.

Moving on, I was fortunate enough to be a history maker yesterday morning. Innovation in action, care of Absolute Radio – whom we talk about on these pages from time to time. Ahhh, who could forget Christian O’Connnell and Cameron Diaz in the ‘Are you a Brentford fan’ reveal…? 

This time, it was care of Hometime DJs Andy Bush and Richie Firth  – on the five-a-side pitch.

Who doesn’t love this version of the game? Well, me these days. Primarily because family life means that playing after work is no longer an option. Why go for glory on the astroturf when there’s a school run to do?  And nothing to do with knackered knees or lungs.

So when the chance of flipping the traditional post-work format of the game on its head via an 8am kick-off  presented itself I was there. Boots out of retirement, gloves back on and goalkeeper for Bushia Dortmund. 

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What a morning. What a game. What a concept. An 8-7 defeat and swollen finger are a small price to pay for being part of the future. It was magnificent fun. I’d love to blame our narrow loss on the fact that Richie’s Railway Madrid featured a player who was the spit of the villain out of Superman 2 (from that spinny space mirror thing) and had his strength but, ultimately, it was down to my crapness. And Richie’s dexterity as opposing ‘keeper. Very much Neville Southall at the end of his career – in more ways than one. Yet if we can take one thing away from all of this it is that morning football is the way forward.  

Huge thanks to Bush, Richie and all at Absolute Radio. The full video goes live today. The teaser is below. The podcast is up already – you can find that one here.  There’s more to follow.    

Until then, you may want to kindly please download the annual Last Word season review for e-book for your kindle, iPod telephone or other electronic reading device. You you can do so, here, with the important bit being that all proceeds received from the £1.99 sale price go to the Brentford FC Community Sports Trust.

It’s shonky, there are typos in it (still) but what better way to while away your time on the commute to work, the toilet, holiday or just simply relive some of the exciting moments from last campaign as we wait for Bob to (hopefully) do his thing for the third time. And then prepare to see them blown out of the water in 2019/20.

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Nick Bruzon

Today? Tomorrow? This week? It must be time to go. Again.

16 Jul

So what comes next at Brentford ? Idle speculation? More ‘stories’ (please note: your definition may vary) linking us with Aston Villa, West Ham et al? Something else? Like actual football. With the team back at Griffin Park following the trip to Austria, next on the agenda is Saturday’s pre-season friendly at Wycombe Wanderers. More importantly, next on the agenda is Saturday’s pre-season friendly at Wycombe Wanderers where the smart(ish) money is being placed on the Bees running out in our brand, spanking new away kit. Who said “idle speculation” now? Yet with the visit of Birmingham City less than three weeks away, surely something has to give on the kit front shortly?

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Ok – this one really is a leap but with the season starting on August 3rd, time is running out. Logic / desperation (delete as applicable) dictates that the big reveal has to be imminent? Doesn’t it? Come on Umbro – not that I care, obviously, but purely just to complete the housekeeping exercise. We’ve got the family day coming shortly There’s also the game with Bournemouth on Saturday week. 7(seven) days later is the start of the season proper when what is left of the Birmingham City squad come to Griffin Park. 

The home kit has been well launched already and looks magnificent. It’s on sale in the club shop now and anybody popping in early to pick theirs up will have seen the huge stack of boxes labelled ‘away socks’. Sadly, no amount of typing the codes from the packaging labels into google throws up any clues as to whether Wiz Khalifa’s black and yellow really is the new brown and orange. As has been well speculated thanks to those Twitter clues from Kitman Bob. I’m still hoping we go with the Brown Bag option – just for the meltdown if nothing else.

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The new home shirt is already flying off the shelves at the Club Shop

It goes without saying that red and white will clash horrifically with the blue of Wycombe. For that reason alone I’m hoping we get to see the boys in the new shirts. Nobody want a clash or Sir Alex Fergie ‘Ferguson’ style excuses about shirt colours.   Nothing to do with desperation to finally see what has the unenviable task of replacing last season’s best ever away kit. However, if the Umbro produced shirts we’ve seen so far are anything to go by, then the second choice kit could be something special. 

Our home shirt is simple but stylish and screams’ 80s’. Honestly I think it is our best in years and cannot wait for pocket money day when I’m allowed to go and buy one at the end of the month.

The goalkeeper’s top, whilst burning the retinas, is actually a lot smarter and more subtle in the flesh than it is from those initial publicity shots. The club shop also has these on sale and, despite the failed efforts of all pictures to mute the glare. up close and personal it really is a toned down orange colour rather than anything from electric cherry red to fit-inducing tangerine.   

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Honestly – it’s not lurid up close

So this is the week when we finally get to see it. I think. I guess. I have no source close to the club. I have no inside knowledge. I’m just putting 2+2 together and looking at the limited time left on the calendar. When I’m wrong, come back and laugh. If I’m right, then let’s keep our fingers crossed. Let’s also run to the hills – something very scary will have happened for yours truly to get lucky.

Until then, you may want to kindly please download the annual Last Word season review for e-book for your kindle, iPod telephone or other electronic reading device. You you can do so, here, with the important bit being that all proceeds received from the £1.99 sale price go to the Brentford FC Community Sports Trust.

It’s shonky, there are typos in it (still) but what better way to while away your time on the commute to work, the toilet, holiday or just simply relive some of the exciting moments from last campaign as we wait for Bob to do his thing. And then prepare to see them blown out of the water in 2019/20.

Thank you.

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Nick Bruzon

Umbro take Brentford Back To The Future with new shirt launch.

14 Jun

Dear Ryan Murrant. Could I be the first to say how much the new Brentford home shirt sucks. Except, of course, I can’t. Not even to try and get a freebie. The club officially revealed the 2019/20 Umbro kit today and, it has to be said, we’ve picked an absolute stunner for our final season at Griffin Park. The spirit of Osca 1984-85 very much reborn as Kitman Bob’s earlier promise of ‘New vibes and old skool’ has been borne out in some style.

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I love it. Seriously love it. It would be no exaggeration to say this is probably our finest choice for a ‘home’ kit since the early nineties. It is about as retro as we could hope to get yet at the same time Umbro have given us something bang up to date with their first stab at a Brentford shirt. Clean lines, bold colours and instantly recognizable as ‘Brentford’.

#WeAreBrentford, indeed.

What a way to say goodbye to Adidas after a ‘partnership’ that promised much but, if we’re being honest, ultimately felt a bit flat – the yellow ‘away’ from our first Championship season and the magnificent brown and orange being obvious exceptions. The open goal of producing an ’80-’81 remake being one that the German giants very much missed. In contrast, Umbro have made no mistake when they’ve been given the opportunity to take a spin in the metaphorical Tardis with Doctor Bob.

Squint at this one and you may aswell stick on a Dire Straits LP, pop out to the cinema for Back To The Future or A View To A Kill and then lose at Wembley. It feels as close to 1985 as you can get beyond being there.

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The pictures are all over the internet. And the club. And the club shop. Taking a stroll up Braemar Road on the school run this afternoon one couldn’t help but be drawn to the huge posters that are now in place showing this one off to the world.

The black v neck collar and sleeve trim. The thick red and white stripes. The new (non-gambling) sponsor. The famous Umbro double-diamond. Our club crest that is definitely a Bee. Definitely.  The detail on the back of the neck, proclaiming it to be our farewell to Griffin Park. Looking in the club shop, this is already iconography that seems sure to be repeated as the campaign reaches an emotional denouement.

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Plenty of posters as well as screen shots

Downsides? Are there any? Well, we don’t have full stripes on the reverse. That’s a shame. Whilst the players will get past this with their names and numbers, for us mortals on the terrace it does present a brief flashback to the Puma teabag. Or, you could argue, the Osca 83/84 on the reverse…. Yeah. That’ll do. This is just too nice to have bad thoughts about.

Even more intriguing has been the reaction from Kitman Bob on Twitter, Can we read into this that there is even bigger and better to come with is proclamation “Sad to see 🍊 & 🍫 go 😁. But this is nice and can’t wait for the reveal of what’s to follow”

In the short term, get yourself down to Griffin Park if you are in the area. That walk this afternoon gave a further glimpse of the future. The posters all over the turnstiles and the club shop show more of how we are going to look in a few months’ time. And if you tweet a picture with the aforementioned hashtag, there’s a chance to win some Umbro ’merch’(andise).

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Posters and old skool vibes are the order of the day at Griffin Park

For now, though, what are your thoughts? Good, bad, brilliant, boring? My colours are nailed to the mast. What about yours?

Nick Bruzon

 

Farce of the missing game comes to an end. Can we end on a high ?

4 May

Pope declares his admiration for the Catholic faith. Bear defecates in small forest. Laurence Bassini has insufficient cash.  EFL call off Bolton v Brentford. The most obvious facts since records began were formally, finally, declared yesterday morning with the Bees being awarded a nominal 1-0 win and all three points for the game which will not be played and never had a hope in hell of happening the second it was called off last Friday. Instead, Sunday lunchtime’s visit from Preston North End will now become our final game of the season and, with it, the chance to secure a top ten finish is still on. Likewise, the chance to ensure that the nine points deducted from Birmingham City for breaking financial regulations give no chance of claiming ‘if only’ as we finish above them, again, with Bees already ten points better. 

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At least we got to play Bolton at home this season

What a mess. What a farce. What a shame. The only positive to come out of this in the immediate short term was the game being cancelled. Something which should have happened the exact same second Bolton Wanderers were unable to field a team. We all know the circumstances around why they did this, and there’s no vitriol being directed towards their first team, but the can of worms this opens with teams being able to cancel games unilaterally with no immediate form of solution, sanction or recourse available to the EFL is a worrying one. Might want to update that BCP plan, chaps.

Moreso, it begs the question as to how on earth they felt adequate safety personnel might be in place on Thursday afternoon when the next morning it was realised they wouldn’t. That being the formal reason the game was called off, rather than any considerations around fans, players or other clubs who now see Brentford climb to 12th after our third away win of the season.

Most frustratingly, there was no confirmation from the authorities as to whether we’d recorded the win in our magnificent away kit or who had scored the goal. With Neal Maupay (24) sitting four behind leading scorer Teemu Pukki of Norwich City (28) this would have been an excellent chance to try and narrow that gap. Instead, there’s only the Preston game left for Neal to try and finish top of the Championship pile .

Likewise, the brown and orange has been denied a triumphant farewell. Brentifrd fans were left crying into their beer last night at this devastating news, with Kitman Bob having used Twitter to declare that..

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For all I’m rooting for Neal in the goalscorer stakes, for the purposes of this result I’m pretty sure it was Sergi Canos on 7(seven) minutes who got this one. That said, it was @OllieW3BB on Twitter who probably wins the BBGiveaway this time around. His own shout for the time of the first goal deserving of more than a few ‘likes’ – something which at least one person seemed to appreciate.

Ollie: If my maths is right, the 8493rd min!!! Almost 6 days after KO 😂😂😂     

Kitman Bob: deserves a training top at least !!!

As for Brentford, like it or not as to how this happened we’re now up to 12th. I still say we would have won, regardless, and the point been Brentford’s had the game taken place on pitch.

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Brentford have won away?

If nothing else, The Trotters visit back in December brought about a most telling exchange in our house between Mrs. Bruzon and five year old Harry.

Rachel: “They won!! Does that mean the jinx is off and I can come back to football?”

Harry: “No mummy. Bolton were so bad that even if you’d been here Brentford would still have won”

Recent form and the current situation suggest nothing had changed on that front. Instead, we’re now in a position where, in theory, 10th place is still available. for that to happen we not only need to beat Preston on Sunday (something which is by no means a given) but also rely on favours. Including a win for Bolton at Nottingham Forest. With morale through the floor, the realist in me just can’t see that happening although I live in hope.

Regardless, our own victory is an essential. Primarily, to end the season on a high but as much to widen the gap over Birmingham City to a potential 13 points. That, an outcome which will please yours truly (at the least) for reasons which have been well documented on these pages and of which Harlee’s ten times better nonsense is only the most recent. Although at least on this day of piss weak ‘jokes’ (Star Wars fans, I’m looking at you) it has brought a smile to my face thinking about his interview and the on-pitch payback. Again. Thinking about their inability to beat us or finish above us. Again.

Roll on Sunday. See you there.

League after game 45

After 45 games, there’s still plenty to play for

Nick Bruzon