Tag Archives: new

Near brackets, no Dalsgaard, shirt news and a Bee appears in France…

6 Sep

My word. Who’d be an actual journalist for a living at times like these? What do you talk about when there’s nothing to talk about? Apart from trawling Twitter or making rumours up. Thank goodness for the blogger’s ability to pick up, and put down, the keyboard as and when the feeling takes hold. To be able to play around with photoshop, on an ad-hoc basis,  just for the fun of doing so. Another International break symptomised this perfectly with last week’s humping of Derby County already feeling an eternity away. Instead,  primary focus in our house now being on Gibraltar. They restarted football proceedings for us last night and ended up one shy of a home bracketing against Denmark. It was a game which saw the World Cup’s Henrik Dalsgaard of Brentford start on the bench. England have their own run out on Saturday against, well I don’t even know being honest. Without checking. Looks at internet – Bulgaria.  It is the easiest qualifying system since records began in a tournament that it is practically impossible for any team with pretensions of ‘being any good’ not to make the final rounds. Even Scotland are still in with a chance at present. Mathematically.  Back on the club scene we’ve talk of the Kurupt FM Brentford away shirt aswell as an overseas appearance for our fan engagement office, Ryan Murrant, Plus the latest on The Last Word Fantasy Football tournament.

Gibraltar bots and bag

Gibraltar packed their boots for another Euro qualifier…

First up, Euro 2020. Regular readers may be aware of the family connection that sees yours truly focus on Gibraltar whenever an International opportunity presents itself. As ever, the Sky Sports smudge button was pressed as the boys from the Rock had their latest run out on Thursday. That is, the Gibraltar first team rather than Sean Connery and Nicolas Cage although, to be honest the home side could have done with the aforementioned A-listers to break in to the Danish defence. 

Whilst any Bees fans tuning in for a look at Dalsgaard would have been disappointed by his absence, such was the impression made by visitors Denmark that even had he started, opportunities to see our man in action would have been slim to zero. An early goal against. A dubious penalty just after half time and it was game over. Well 6-0 saw it technically game over at full time but it was never really game on. There was to be no close run battle with illustrious visitors as had been seen when the Republic of Ireland came to play. Instead, dreams of another notch on the victor’s bed post will need to remain a dream. For now. 

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If only…

As for England, well of course we’ll be watching. The Griffin have the game on the big screen for those wanting to try and recreate that incredible World Cup atmosphere. Albeit, a group of five teams where the top two go through by default doesn’t have quite the same level of jeapordy as 2018’s penalty shoot out. But one can’t deny these occasions are always fun and, if nothing else, its always a great opportunity to get out at a time when we are starved of a Championship fixture. I really can’t see anything beyond an England win in this one. The days of the international surprise, at least in qualifying, are few and far between these days. As Gibraltar know too well. Perhaps Scotland will prove us wrong this evening. Stranger things have happened…..

The Griffin and England football – always awesome

With no on-pitch action at present, the major talking point at Griffin Park has been the much rumoured Kurupt FM take on the away shirt.

Screenshot 2019-09-06 at 16.28.48I took a wander past the club earlier this week and spoke to a very well connected source who suggested that a shirt is most definitely coming . And all being well, next month. 

This is cracking news and the line to pick these beauties up is sure to be a long one. Especially as I understand that we’ve already run out of adult M and L away shirts (albeit more are on order so stand by your metaphorical guns, Ecoworld fans).

Next up, Ryan Murrant. We all know about our Fan Engagement manager’s social media presence and his wonderful role at the club . About the gold award for Family Excellence given to Brentford last season. But what about the man himself?

Well, if you’d like to know more (to coin a phrase we’ve not used in a while) then how about this piece on French website ’fanstriker’ . It’s in depth and then some but paints a fascinating picture on behind the scenes life at Griffin Park. Enjoy…

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And finally, Fantasy Football. We’re now four weeks in to The Last Word FF league. Four rounds are down and only one player, Simon Burns, is left with a 100% record after the weekly head to head games. Remember, there’s a shirt for the winner so keep those transfers coming and those teams fresh.  

And if Ryan is reading, that’s fiftieth (50th) place so far for his own ‘Enter Team Name’. Remember, it’s a marathon not a sprint…..

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Nick Bruzon

Could THE shirt happen? Plus (another) Kingsley fantasy and loan updates.

3 Sep

That’s the decks cleared just a little bit. Monday saw several Brentford first and B-team players heading out on loan. Reece Cole to Partick Thistle, Marcus Forss goes down the road to AFC Wimbledon whilst Ellery Balcombe (Viborg FF) and Emiliano Marcondes (Midtjylland) are both spending some time in Denmark. Elsewhere, the identify of the mysterious ‘Trialist 89’ has been revealed by the club with the latest acquisiton to the B-team and do we have a very special new away shirt in the offing? 

First up, the out door. The news about Reece was broken by none other than Partick Thistle’s enigmatic mascot, Kingsley. At least, that’s how yours truly found out. Is there nothing he can’t do?

Presumably there was some sort of official story out there too but there’s no finer tweet than breaking transfer news being revealed by the pointy haired superstar. Forget Jim White and his own deadline day nonsense (and I wish we could after the shabby way they treated Bolton and Bury last week). 

If Sky are to persist with the yellow theme as transfer windows continue to ‘slam shut’, then who better than Kingsley to be at the forefront of that delivery? Well, Natalie Sawyer perhaps? Been there. Done that. Their and our loss. Sadly.

That said, one can only dream about what that partnership would look like come January should Sky elect to reverse their decision whilst also bin Jim for the true king of Yellow…  

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Now THIS would be the Deadline Day dream team

The news about Marcus was somewhat expected. Mainly because he had updated his own Twitter account to follow AFC Wimbledon prior to the official announcement. The good news here being that he has preceeded the move by signing a long term contract at Griffin Park / Lionel Road . The four year extension which will see him remain a big part of our plans, with Director of football Phil Giles telling official that “We hope that he will do a fantastic job for Wimbledon and then be ready to return to compete for a place in our first team, still with many more years to look forward to at Brentford.” 

The story, which you can read in full on ‘official’ is as noteworthy for the spanking new biro being used to sign the contract extension at the Jersey Road portacabin. The memory of Pontus and his half-chewed BIC one which will neither be forgotten nor replicated. Sadly.

That said, both Marcus and Reece are players with the potential for big futures at Brentford. Partick Thistle and Wimbledon are very much the beneficiaries and it will be interesting to see how both players fill their boots in the short term. Just as long as Reece doesn’t have his head turned by Kinglsey. Don’t forget about Buzzette. There’s no scarier sight than a mascot scorned. Just ask Mrs. Growler at Huddersfield (long story)…

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Nice pen

Elsewhere Ellery Balcombe, currently starved of first team opportunity with Luke Daniels keeping the bench warm, gets his chance in Denmark. Also joining him, although a step higher, is Emiliano Marcondes. The former, a player with so much potential and a current England U-21 whilst it would be fair to say that the later hasn’t, yet, delivered on the promise with which he arrived. A period at Brentford blighted by injury hasn’t given him the chance to show what we’ve been hoping for so here’s to some time away giving him the chance to demonstrate that promise.

Will any/ all four of these players return ? Who knows? Whilst one certainly hopes so, the sale of hot prospect Chiedozie Ogbene to Rotherham United proves there is no mercy. No room for passengers. The squads are being trimmed into a lean, mean football machine. Possibly. At the end of the day, Clive, I’m just the numpty on the terrace with more knowledge about kits than first team affairs.

And talking of which, with sledgehammer like unsubtly we make the short leap to the Brentford away shirt. Already a thing of beauty, it was further enhanced when Matthew Benham revealed the   Kurupt FM special variant. With the reaction to this reveal being universal popularity, rather than his people just doing nothing about this it seems that there is now the very real possibility of the kit becoming a reality. The GPG have announced on Twitter that, apparently, current sponsors Ecoworld have given their blessing for this new version to be released. Checks diary – not April 1st. 

One can only hope this is true. One can only hope we have the means to make this happen. Prepare to see these fly off the shelves if so. A masterpiece in the offing. Kitman Bob, if you are reading, you know what to do…….

The other shirt that is currently the hottest property in Griffin Park folklore is that belonging to the mysterious ‘Trialist 89’. He was announced to the world last week when scoring the second goal against the QPR U-23 team.

It was a strike which produced one of the greatest tweets used by Brentford official and a wonderful riposte to those standard goal scorer gif/meme things inflicted on us all by Bristol City. 

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Now Trialist 89 has been revealed to the world as left sided defender Aubrel Koutismouka who has signed a two year contract with the B-team. As ever, ‘official’ have the full story. Good look Aubrel and welcome to Griffin Park, young man.

Even if you will be forever ’89 in my eyes.

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Nick Bruzon

Thomas the frank engine aiming for full steam ahead against Hull.

17 Aug

It’s time for Brentford to exorcise the memory of the League Cup. With Hull City set to visit Griffin Park on Saturday afternoon, thoughts will be along the lines of last week at Middlesbrough or last season’s 5-1 thrashing of The Tigers rather than the midweek draw with Cambridge United. That one’s been and gone. Ground that has been covered and no real tears shed. Move along, nothing to see here. We can concentrate on the league etc etc. No bad thing given the tough run of fixtures now upon us with Leeds United away on Wednesday and then the trip to Charlton next weekend.

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Brentford were head and shoulders above Hull last season

First things first. Today. Like Brentford, Hull have picked up three points from their opening fixtures following a win (Reading) and a defeat (Swansea City). Two games in, the nascent state of the table makes it impossible to get a genuine fix on who is in with a chance of going up, who are dead certs for the drop and who is going to be the recipient of the annual Leeds United choke award. Presumably, Leeds United for that last one. So it really is a journey in to the unknown for Brentford and as much for Thomas Frank on his team selection.

He named an unchanged side to the one that somehow lost the season opener to Birmingham City for the subsequent trip to Middlesbrough. Whilst we may have ridden our luck early into that one, nobody who saw it could deny how we grew into the game. The wonderful way we took the lead with Sergi and Ollie combining magnificently for the goal (kudos to Emiliano Marcondes, too, for luring the entire Boro’ defence out of position) and then closed it out with some comfort. Thomas was purring like a kitten at full time and understandably so. 

That said, he now has more players with time under their belts. That being one positive to come from the performance against Cambridge United. And with a busy week to come (those trips to Leeds and Charlton await) could changes come? Thomas used his press conference to confirm that Ethan Pinnock was doubtful, Kamo and Norgaard need to be assessed whilst Said is getting closer and closer. How good will it be to have any combination of those players available for selection ?  

Talking about last season’s 5-1, he was quick to recognise the performance but not dwell on it. Instead, calling it a “New game. New history  although going on to add that , “so we never know what is going to happen but the aim for us is for us to dominate and play with intensity.  Positive sounding for sure, in an interview packed with talk of attacking intent and maintaining the performance for the entire game. You can see that one here….

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Whilst the 5-1 may now be deemed history, the BBC match preview does give some very telling statistics. You can see the full piece here but the one that really grabbed me were the facts that the Bees have allowed our opponents just 15 touches in their box in their first two Championship matches. That’s six fewer than any other team. If any evidence was needed of the immediate impact being made by Pontus Jansson and the new look defence then here it is. I still maintain that picking him up from Leeds Untied was the Championship signing of the season.

The evidence to date has been quite telling. The skill, the passion, the heart on the sleeve, the armband being immediately awarded. His reaction on pitch after Birmingham and on social media after Middlesbrough tells you all you need to know about his attitude. Magnificent. Elland Road on Wednesday could be fun 🙂  

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View from the Braemar – Captain Jansson has impressed.

Let’s not get ahead of ourselves though. All that’s to come and there are more pressing matters at hand. If nothing else, the question of what kit the visitors will turn up in. Their magnificent Umbro home shirt with the return of the Tiger strip design ? Or the new third kit that was launched this week? Something the club describe as  a contemporary design in deep lagoon, accompanied by medieval blue shorts. Hats off to Umbro, as with the Bees they’ve designed some stunners this season. 

Nice though it is, here’s hoping that it’s the performance rather than the shirts we’re drooling over today. Wit the weather set fair and blue skies already over Griffin Park, the conditions should be perfect. I can’t wait for this one. See you there.

Which will we get this afternoon? Home or third?

Nick Bruzon

Is this the funniest joke since records began? No. More importantly, will Neal start today?

20 Jul

“She drags me all the way from Billingsgate to Richmond to play about the weakest practical joke since Cardinal Wolsey got his nob out at Hampton Court and stood at the end of the passage pretending to be a door.” Not my words but those of TV’s Edmund Blackadder. And words which have now been surpassed by Huddersfield Town making the utterly predictable reveal that their ‘sash’ shirt was a fake after we were finally treated to the real thing. On matters closer to home, Brentford travel to Wycombe Wanderers this afternoon where there will be more than a passing interest in Thomas Frank’s starting XI.

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Umbro rescue Huddersfield Town supporters. At the second attempt.

Let’s start with Huddersfield Town. Why not? With Brentford fans still basking in the glory or our own Umbro designs for 2019/20, knees jerked on Thursday when the Terriers ‘revealed’ their own effort for the forthcoming season. The oversized sponsor’s sash, promoting a bookmaker, prompting immediate horror from those who fell for it and scorn form just about everybody else. The horrors of online betting. The obvious breach in regulations. The fact that Huddersfield were playing along in a joke at their own expense.

Most crucially, the abject awfulness of the alleged kit. How do you even cock up a sash shirt? This should be impossible, given it’s a universally accepted fact that this is a look which is up there with the very best in shirt design.  That Huddersfield managed to mangle it so badly, at their own expense, whilst simultaneously pissing off almost the entire fanbase is a PR stunt that has well and truly backfired. Except, of course, for Mr. P who has more than earned his pound of advertising flesh. I mean, who wasn’t talking about them in footballing circles?

And then, surprise surprise, it was all revealed to be a hilarious prank. Despite us being nowhere even close to April 1st. To quote Blackadder once more, “I thank God I wore my corset, because I think my sides have split.

On the plus side, the new look unveiled by Huddersfield Town is magnificent. Hats off to Umbro for pulling this one out of the kit bag. They really are on fire this season. Even better, the official incarnation of the Huddersfield shirt has the luxury of being sponsor free. It’s just a shame their fans had to go through all that nonsense to get there.

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Crystal Palace. Vasco Da Gama. Peru. All prove it should be impossible to mess up a sash kit.

Right. Wycombe Wanderers v Brentford. There’s one topic on everybody’s lips. And it’s not whether we’ll be wearing black and yellow. Neal Maupay. Will he start? Will he be here at the start of the season? Have there been any bids? Are we really preparing the way for his departure with the reported acquisition of Bryan Mbuemo from Troyes?

Persaonlly, I take the offerings from sites such as Football League World and HITC with a huge dollop of salt – when it comes to actual facts, they’re normally about as on target as a Murray Jones and Nick Proschwitz dream team. Yet when Beesotted are talking about it (and you can read their thoughts here) then stand up and take notice.  Should the Mbuemo story prove correct, might he even be an acquisition rather than a replacement? Matthew Benham does love to surprise us.

Ultimately, nobody really knows. This is all part and parcel of being a Brentford fan these days. Trust in the long term set up and overall squad balance, tempered with the more immediate angst at the prospect of saying goodbye to any one of several club heroes.

No matter how philosophical one has to remain about the quite wonderful way in which we conduct our business, football is an emotional game. We all love the likes of Neal, Said, Ollie, Sergi, Romaine. To name but a few. The immediate reaction to any combo of them leaving would see us gutted – no matter what comes next. Just look at the plaudits for Yoann Barbet, despite his eventual destination. then again, look at who has signed up at Griffin Park in lieu of him and Ezri. It works!

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Here’s to more in 2019/20…..

So Neal may start at Wycombe. He may be on the bench. It doesn’t really matter in terms of serving up a clue about longer term intention. Unless, of course, the likes of Billy Reeves can get to him after the match and administer a gentle probing so we can hear from the man himself about his own thoughts.

One can dream.

And finally, time is running out on me annoying you about the annual Last Word season review e-book for your kindle, iPod telephone or other electronic reading device. However, with all proceeds received from the £1.99 sale price going to the Brentford FC Community Sports Trust its worth a mention. 

You can download it here and whilst it’s shonky, whilst I’m still spotting typos in it and some of the jokes are almost as weak as The Huddersfield shirt launch, what better way to while away your time on the commute to work, the toilet, holiday or just simply relive some of the exciting moments from last campaign as we wait for 2019/20 to start? If nothing else, it has a whole host of material not previously published on this site. That’s meant as a good thing, by the way.

Thanks. As ever.

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Nick Bruzon

My morning with Bush interrupts one kit launch and one kit ‘launch’.

18 Jul

Clanggggg – the sound of a name being dropped. There was no Last Word yesterday as a previous football related engagement with Absolute Radio (more to follow) meant it was a case of being up, ready and out of the house before 6am – the usual point at which this nonsense is being put together. Which was gutting for this kit nerd given that the previous day had seen the launch of the new Brentford away shirt. Gut reaction to that one is that we have an absolute stunner. On the plus side, it means we have had time to ‘enjoy’ the ‘hilarious’ ‘joke’ shirt launch at Huddersfield Town. At least, I am assuming it is a joke launch – at the time of writing that has yet to be confirmed.

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It is what it says

Tuesday morning had seen these pages looking for a potential ‘away’ shirt at some point this week. Two hours later and it was on us. Coincidence and pot luck rather than anything more sinister at play, I assure you. I hope. Then again, nothing to hurt by writing that I’m fairly sure Neal Maupay will be signing a contract extension in the next couple of days. Move along – nothing to see here. Back to the shirt.

Oh. My. Word. Umbro and Kitman Bob really have hit the jackpot this season. I loved the home version. Our change strip is glorious. Discarding all the usual techno-babble about breathable material, seams, side panels etc etc that goes with these things, we’ll cut to the chase . If for no other reason than everybody has seen it whilst Luis Adriano has dissected this (and previous versions) in magnificent detail already – do look at his piece which you can find here.

Black. Jet Black. Yellow trim. A monochromatic badge. Bee colours. Beautiful. Just beautiful. It’s the first time in a few seasons I’ll be buying a home and an away kit which, given the state of yours truly’s bank balance, is no small claim. We’ve got it wrong or come close so many times but to hit the mark first time out with both shirts is testament to the partnership being formed with Umbro.

One can only imagine what we’ll have lined up for the third shirt which, reading between the lines, IS coming. Kitman Bob’s tweet in response to a question of whether that would be delivered,  suggesting that we enjoy this one first, implies that there is more to come. And definitely not just me reading into this what I want to.

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Great work all round

Talking of Kitman Bob, his Wiz Khalifa clue from earlier in the summer paid out in wonderful style. With fans guessing he meant ‘Black and Yellow’ it was another nice touch from Brentford ‘official’ to title the launch email “Yeah, uh huh, you know what it is…”. They lyrical amongst us / those who double checked on google, just in case (delete as applicable) obviously recognising the opening line from the former Billboard 100 chart topper.

The only downside to any of this is that the ditching of Adidas means we’ve no hope of ever seeing the brown/orange again. Even in the event of a colour clash against, say, Bournemouth who play in red and black. Yet as we bemoaned this sad loss, one Twitter correspondent noted: You’ve just married Helena Christiansen and you’re lusting over Ann Widdicombe?

Personally, I’d say that it was more a case of just marrying Helena Christiansen then lusting over Cameron Diaz. They’re both great. They’re both Brentford. Or are they….

Next up. Huddersfield Town. Yawn. Urghh. Yesterday’s sponsor joke being played at their expense, yet seemingly in full co-operation with the club, has kind of backfired. The obvious knee jerks of disgust were all over social media within nano-seconds. If for no other reason than how do you mess up a sash kit? Surely that’s sartorially impossible?  Peru, Crystal Palace, Vasco da Gama of Brazil have all proven many times how wonderful this design feature can look. 

Then there was the realisation that the size of this logo clearly breached the 250 square centimetre area on the front of a kit permitted for such advertising. The FA have been obliged to step in as we all waste time waiting for the true reveal. I could bang on but, frankly, nobody wants to read about it. The sponsor have achieved their presumed aim of getting people talking about them. Huddersfield, meanwhile, have a short term ‘cult’ classic that is truly deserving of the title: Worst. Shirt. Ever. And given it was worn in last night’s friendly game, could technically now be deemed canon. Even if only for one game. We can all moan about the attrocities at play but the ultimate realisation that people are using the phrase ‘bantz’ to describe what is happening is reason enough to consign this whole sorry affair to the waste bin of history.

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Don’t. Promote. Sponsor.

Moving on, I was fortunate enough to be a history maker yesterday morning. Innovation in action, care of Absolute Radio – whom we talk about on these pages from time to time. Ahhh, who could forget Christian O’Connnell and Cameron Diaz in the ‘Are you a Brentford fan’ reveal…? 

This time, it was care of Hometime DJs Andy Bush and Richie Firth  – on the five-a-side pitch.

Who doesn’t love this version of the game? Well, me these days. Primarily because family life means that playing after work is no longer an option. Why go for glory on the astroturf when there’s a school run to do?  And nothing to do with knackered knees or lungs.

So when the chance of flipping the traditional post-work format of the game on its head via an 8am kick-off  presented itself I was there. Boots out of retirement, gloves back on and goalkeeper for Bushia Dortmund. 

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What a morning. What a game. What a concept. An 8-7 defeat and swollen finger are a small price to pay for being part of the future. It was magnificent fun. I’d love to blame our narrow loss on the fact that Richie’s Railway Madrid featured a player who was the spit of the villain out of Superman 2 (from that spinny space mirror thing) and had his strength but, ultimately, it was down to my crapness. And Richie’s dexterity as opposing ‘keeper. Very much Neville Southall at the end of his career – in more ways than one. Yet if we can take one thing away from all of this it is that morning football is the way forward.  

Huge thanks to Bush, Richie and all at Absolute Radio. The full video goes live today. The teaser is below. The podcast is up already – you can find that one here.  There’s more to follow.    

Until then, you may want to kindly please download the annual Last Word season review for e-book for your kindle, iPod telephone or other electronic reading device. You you can do so, here, with the important bit being that all proceeds received from the £1.99 sale price go to the Brentford FC Community Sports Trust.

It’s shonky, there are typos in it (still) but what better way to while away your time on the commute to work, the toilet, holiday or just simply relive some of the exciting moments from last campaign as we wait for Bob to (hopefully) do his thing for the third time. And then prepare to see them blown out of the water in 2019/20.

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Nick Bruzon

New signing ‘in’ and a look back at High Street shopping after horror kit reveal.

3 Jul

Sound the ‘incoming’ transfer klaxon. Brentford have confirmed the signing of centre back Ethan Pinnock from Barnsley. The player joined on Tuesday afternoon for a fee that is being widely suggested by local news sources as close to £3m. Elsewhere, Stevenage have launched their home and away kits with their somewhat unusual selections being met with widespread derision. Aswell as a suggestion that they have adopted a motif first set by Brighton & Hove Albion. And in the Women’s World Cup, there’s been horror for England – of more than one variety.

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First up, Ethan Pinnock. The news was revealed yesterday via, amongst other announcements, a somewhat ‘low key’ video reveal. No puffs of smoke, crazy graphics, jingles, cringey hashtags or foreign getaways – just a slow pan across the training ground to a distant shot of our latest acquisition. This can only be a good thing. Both the player and the sensible use of social media. 

He certainly has pedigree and was one of the players of 2018/19 as Barnsley secured a return to the Championship. The club’s player of the year, he had a hand in keeping 21 clean sheets aswell as being named in the PFA team of the season. 

Thomas Frank praised his aerial ability and left foot whilst Director of football Phil Giles told official that, “ The centre back position is an area we clearly needed to strengthen this summer, since both Chris Mepham and Yoann Barbet have left the Club in the last six months without replacement. Ethan fits the bill perfectly and follows a long tradition of good players who have chosen to join Brentford from League One and League Two. We welcome him to the Club and wish him every success”.

This certainly reads like a positive signing which will strengthen a defence that is also missing a goalkeeper after Daniel Bentley joined Bristol City. Presumably more news to come on that front at some point in the near future. Then again, Brentford being Brentford I wouldn’t hold my breath for anything anymore. One thing we continue to do is surprise with our transfer policy – both in and out. The only consistent thing being that, by and large, it is one which has seen us keep on improving as seemingly irreplaceable players are replaced for a fraction of the price.

Anyway, you can read the full story here and f you want to follow Ethan on Twitter he is at @EasyEatss.

Next up, new kit. As Bees fans wait for the 2019/20 away shirt to launch (come on, brown), we’ve been able to turn our attention elsewhere as more and more clubs offer up their latest designs into the public eye. Stevenage were amongst those going yesterday and, it would be fair to say, that theirs has not been well received. As a quick glance to the ‘reveal’ on social media will testify .

My word. Amongst those comments to really hit home were :

“Worst kit in the clubs history”, 

“Worst kit in football history tbh’, 

“Home kit looks like that sheet they put on the Burger King trays”  

“This has to be a joke surely”.

”Burger King as a sponsor and it looks like someone’s thrown mustard and ketchup all over the away kit.”

Although my personal favourite was…

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That was, until, Darren Thompson did his thing and pretty much nailed it.

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If for no other reason than it immediately put me in mind of Brighton and Hove Albion and one of their most iconic shirts – the 1989-91 effort produced by Sports Express. Much like the Stevenage Kwik Save now does, this was one of the first to model itself on a High Street carrier bag – the infamous Tesco design. 

Brighton Tesco carrier bag shirt 1989-91

Must.Resist.Deliberate ‘Tesco bag / shirt (l-r)’ caption mix up

That said, Brighton and Norwich aren’t the only club to have taken inspiration from the shops. Back at the same time as the Seagulls were doing the Tesco thing, Norwich City were aiming a little bit more upmarket.

Their own Asics ‘away’ shirt one which very much put one in mind of a Waitrose delivery van whilst, of course, who could forget the (incorrect) B&Q  / Sainsburys references inspired by our beautiful brown and orange last season?

Norwich Waitrose

Were the Norwich City club shop expanding their home delivery service?

All this does make me somewhat wary about what is going to happen whenever our own change option is revealed. There’s no way we can top 2019/20. Instead, it’s simply a case of crossing the fingers and waiting for Kitman Bob and Umbro to do their thing.

Last night also saw the semi-finals of the Women’s World Cup. England went down 2-1 to the USA, in a game that was, frankly, ruined by two things. Frist up, as ever, ‘that band’. Despite the sell out in Lyon, they were still allowed in – as they’ve been in all games previously – to sour the atmosphere with their moribund and off-key parping. Why? Why? Why? How? Regular readers to these pages know the rant off by heart at this juncture, I’m sure. But wit apologies for laziness, I’m going to repeat one of several variants.

I’m not going to mince any words here. I loathe them. Absolutely loathe them. When the Mexican Wave or Robbie Williams singing ‘Let me Entertain You’ (which you can find on: Now that’s what I call Stadium music, also featuring: ‘We Are The Champions’) have the moral high ground in the low brow sporting tedium stakes then there’s something seriously wrong.  

Given the choice of being gaffer-taped to a chair and subjected to them or Mrs. Brown’s Boys, I honestly think I’d have to side with Brendan O’Carroll performing his toe-curlingly unfunny Irish mammy/man in a cardigan routine. But enough about my private life.

Nobody is celebrating this news

Seriously? Who actually likes them? Who goes to a game thinking that their experience is going to be enhanced by the alleged band of England’s alleged supporters? This self-appointed bunch of footballing cuckoos in the nest. These tedious purveyors of off-key tromboning, repeating those ‘greatest hits ad-nauseaum. I’ve written it before – many times – and will no doubt do so again in future.

What this match needs to liven it up right now is some flaccid parping and a whiny rendition of ‘The theme from the Great Escape’, ‘The Italian Job’ or the National Anthem” Said Nobody. Ever.

So I was already in a bad place by the time VAR killed any remaining atmosphere stone dead. Talk about sucking the emotion, the passion and the excitement out of the game. A series of prolonged second half decisions , both of which were marginal at best, eventually denied England a hair’s breadth equaliser and then granted a soft looking penalty. Both were inconclusive. Both took an eternity. Both were wrong. Both killed the game. England deserved at least the draw. This time around, they had the ball in the et that would have given them that prize. Instead, another step was taken towards the beautiful game being slowly suffocated. Stop it now. Please.

And finally, as ever, I’d be hugely grateful if you were able to please download a copy of the Last Word season season review – containing the least bad of these columns from the World Cup to Aston Villa deserving to win the play offs. It also includes the World Cup aswell as all the ‘Park Life’ articles submitted for the matchday programme and so not previously available on these pages.  

ALL proceeds received are being donated to the Brentford FC Community Sports Trust so what better way to remind yourself how brilliant 2018/19 was? To kill a bit of time on the commute to work / on your summer holidays / on the toilet etc You can download it , now, for your kindle , iPod telephone or other electronic reading device here.

At £1.99 it’s cheaper than half a pint so what’s to lose? Apart from £1.99 – which then goes to The Community Sports Trust anyway. Many thanks again. And enjoy.  

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Ten times better than we could have hoped for – although perhaps not the shirt. Final Griffin Park game revealed.

21 Jun

Well that’s been an interesting few days. Hot on the heels of Yoann Barbet and Garry Monk, the Championship news keeps on coming thick and fast. Brentford fans can now start planning their away days – in theory – after the league fixtures were revealed yesterday. The computer has been very kind to us, even allowing for  early trips to Leeds United and Middlesbrough. Things kick off with a visit from Birmingham City and finish with a final game at home to Barnsley. Elsewhere, we have a new goalkeeper shirt (as Ibuprofen sales go through the roof to cope with the impending migraine) whilst yesterday’s League Cup draw, from a supermarket (as you do) sees us gifted a 24th chance to experience Griffin Park one more time as Cambridge United are the visitors.

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We have a new GK shirt – sunglasses not included.

The excitement levels ahead of the 2019/20 campaign cranked up a few notches now we know when we’ll be playing who. It’s fair to say that the fate handed out to us by the legendary ‘fixture computer’ is ten times better than anybody could have asked for. A visit from troubled Birmingham City, now bereft of both Jota and Garry Monk, kicks things off on August 3rd. Regardless of any discontent currently being experienced at St. Andrews, I am sure that Blues will have got their house in order by that point. Thus leaving us with as compelling an encounter as one could hope for at any point in the campaign, let alone to get things underway in the late summer sunshine.

Whilst we always trot out the line about waiting ten games until the table has truly been deemed to have ‘taken shape’, August offers a stern test of our credentials that could well give a firm indication of how we are set. Aswell as hosting Birmingham we’ve got away trips to Middlesbrough and Leeds United (sure to be moved for TV, given there’s a ‘Y’ in the day) along with visits from Hull City and Derby County, technically still Frank Lampard’s Derby County, although those Chelsea stories just won’t go away. Plus there’s my favourite of all ‘away days’, the trip to newly promoted Charlton Athletic.

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That first month of league fixtures in full

There’s a return to Griffin Park for another fixture favourite – the Boxing Day game. Swansea City are the visitors on December 26th. I can’t see it being one to trouble Sky and run the risk of being shifted. If for no other reason, Leeds United aren’t involved. QPR away is October 26th and they visit on January 11th. Fulham come to Griffin Park on December 14th whilst we get the chance to pack out the away end and neutral stands on March 14th.

Rounding it all off is the visit from Barnsley. May 2nd is the final game at Griffin Park. Thankfully it is one which doesn’t have the additional significance of a local derby or a traditional rivalry – unless, of course, Toby Tyke fancies donning his spikes for a rematch of that infamous mascot race against Buzz Bee. Things are going to be emotional enough on that day without adding to the pressure by chucking in the likes of a Fulham or QPR. Albeit, knowing Brentford we’ll probably make the play-offs this time around, just to give us an additional final game and throw all carefully laid plans for saying goodbye into disarray.

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Did he, though?

Next up, the goalkeeper shirt. Cherry Tomato red? Lurid Orange? Definitely electric blue. Definitely ‘different’. Quite how it falls into the ‘retro’ category that the club have been touting, I’m not sure, unless we are talking about a throwback to the garish days of David Button and Graham Benstead?

I have to be honest that my gut reaction was one of abhorrence. It’s not going to fly off the shelves and I’m not going to be rushing out to buy one (except, perhaps, as a Christmas present for Mrs. Bruzon who thinks it’s gorgeous). But having given it a bit more consideration after the knee had jerked, I think this is a smart move from Brentford. And by smart, I mean intelligent rather than stylish.

Screen Shot 2019-06-21 at 07.07.50Goalkeeper’s shirts aren’t traditionally designed to be mass selling items. As long as there’s no clash with the home shirt then bring it on. It has drawn our eye and perhaps the logic here is that it may do the same to opponents. If the colour scheme gives even a fractional advantage then go for it. Who am I to knock kitman Bob’s methodology? I ’m sure he and the club know exactly what they are doing with this one – even if things didn’t work out quite so well for us when ‘that’ Hummel shirt was in use….   

Next, up the draw for the league cup took place yesterday. The tournament sponsors continuing their trend of ‘unusual’ locations/times for the draw and hosting it in a supermarket. Presumably, this is to get people talking about it and mentioning their names so, out of principal, I won’t. Moreso, given that in Brentford at least, the aforementioned supermarket survives only by reason of having no competition rather than customers going there through choice. If their usual empty shelves and ‘borderline’ use by dates was anything to go by, you’d have been forgiven for expecting several of the balls to be missing or the likes of Bradford Park Avenue or Middlesbrough Ironopolis to be included.

Anyway, nonsense aside, we’ve been given a home tie. Cambridge United. In a draw which I’m amazed isn’t rigged – given the number of big-name ties that seem to come out every time the balls are pulled – the first round also sees Wimbledon play MK Dons and the ‘media love-in’ derby between Salford City and Leeds United. One can only assume those two will be picked for TV coverage. Leeds on the box – who’d have thought it?

And finally, as unsubtle as ever, if you’d like to read more (to coin a phrase)….. please do download a copy of the Last Word season season review – containing the least bad of these columns from the World Cup to Aston Villa deserving to win the play offs. It also includes the World Cup aswell as all the ‘Park Life’ articles submitted for the matchday programme and so not previously available on these pages.  

ALL proceeds received are being donated to the Brentford FC Community Sports Trust so what better way to remind yourself how brilliant 2018/19 was? To kill a bit of time on the commute to work / on your summer holidays / on the toilet etc You can download it , now, for your kindle , iPod telephone or other electronic reading device here.

At £1.99 it’s cheaper than half a pint so what’s to lose? Apart from £1.99 – which then goes to a great cause anyway. Many thanks again. And enjoy.

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Nick Bruzon

 

Umbro take Brentford Back To The Future with new shirt launch.

14 Jun

Dear Ryan Murrant. Could I be the first to say how much the new Brentford home shirt sucks. Except, of course, I can’t. Not even to try and get a freebie. The club officially revealed the 2019/20 Umbro kit today and, it has to be said, we’ve picked an absolute stunner for our final season at Griffin Park. The spirit of Osca 1984-85 very much reborn as Kitman Bob’s earlier promise of ‘New vibes and old skool’ has been borne out in some style.

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I love it. Seriously love it. It would be no exaggeration to say this is probably our finest choice for a ‘home’ kit since the early nineties. It is about as retro as we could hope to get yet at the same time Umbro have given us something bang up to date with their first stab at a Brentford shirt. Clean lines, bold colours and instantly recognizable as ‘Brentford’.

#WeAreBrentford, indeed.

What a way to say goodbye to Adidas after a ‘partnership’ that promised much but, if we’re being honest, ultimately felt a bit flat – the yellow ‘away’ from our first Championship season and the magnificent brown and orange being obvious exceptions. The open goal of producing an ’80-’81 remake being one that the German giants very much missed. In contrast, Umbro have made no mistake when they’ve been given the opportunity to take a spin in the metaphorical Tardis with Doctor Bob.

Squint at this one and you may aswell stick on a Dire Straits LP, pop out to the cinema for Back To The Future or A View To A Kill and then lose at Wembley. It feels as close to 1985 as you can get beyond being there.

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The pictures are all over the internet. And the club. And the club shop. Taking a stroll up Braemar Road on the school run this afternoon one couldn’t help but be drawn to the huge posters that are now in place showing this one off to the world.

The black v neck collar and sleeve trim. The thick red and white stripes. The new (non-gambling) sponsor. The famous Umbro double-diamond. Our club crest that is definitely a Bee. Definitely.  The detail on the back of the neck, proclaiming it to be our farewell to Griffin Park. Looking in the club shop, this is already iconography that seems sure to be repeated as the campaign reaches an emotional denouement.

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Plenty of posters as well as screen shots

Downsides? Are there any? Well, we don’t have full stripes on the reverse. That’s a shame. Whilst the players will get past this with their names and numbers, for us mortals on the terrace it does present a brief flashback to the Puma teabag. Or, you could argue, the Osca 83/84 on the reverse…. Yeah. That’ll do. This is just too nice to have bad thoughts about.

Even more intriguing has been the reaction from Kitman Bob on Twitter, Can we read into this that there is even bigger and better to come with is proclamation “Sad to see 🍊 & 🍫 go 😁. But this is nice and can’t wait for the reveal of what’s to follow”

In the short term, get yourself down to Griffin Park if you are in the area. That walk this afternoon gave a further glimpse of the future. The posters all over the turnstiles and the club shop show more of how we are going to look in a few months’ time. And if you tweet a picture with the aforementioned hashtag, there’s a chance to win some Umbro ’merch’(andise).

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Posters and old skool vibes are the order of the day at Griffin Park

For now, though, what are your thoughts? Good, bad, brilliant, boring? My colours are nailed to the mast. What about yours?

Nick Bruzon

 

Oh my word. We’ve only gone and done it. This is fantastic.

8 May

Amazing. Incredible. Unbelievable. We have witnessed history in the making. It would be no exaggeration to describe this moment as epochal. As Sir Alex Fergie ‘Ferguson’ said when Manchester United won the 1999 Champions League final in those most dramatic of circumstances, “Football, bloody hell.” Yet that’s how things feel this morning…. Brentford have only gone and done it. We’ve named Umbro as our new technical sponsor. This is magnificent. One has to feel for Liverpool supporters whom, having enjoyed their own moment against Barcelona last night, now find themselves sliding down football’s pecking order of intrigue. Albeit we will get there in a moment but, of course, can only start with this morning’s breaking story from Griffin Park (and we don’t mean the rumoured appointment of Mark Warburton at QPR).

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My inner kit-nerd is cock-a-hoop at the news Brentford have appointed Umbro next season. Names don’t get any more iconic than theirs with the manufacturer, who celebrate their 95th birthday this month, producing some bona-fide classics over the years. What this means for The Bees, at least in terms of design, we have no idea from the short video which has been released this morning. Kitman Bob’s clues have hinted at a possible three shirts this season, with the away colours being one of brown, black/yellow or gold/white. Then again, he could have been throwing out Matthew Benham style clues and so we’ll have to wait until the big reveal – hopefully next month – to see the full reveal.

That said, sniffing around the internet at some of the templates / designs already announced for next season, I am excited. The Gremio (Brazil) ‘away’ in our home colours would be incredible. I’m not normally a fan of collars but have to admit this is a wonderful design. Moreso if black trim were to be incorporated. Looking at the Bournemouth shirt, the great news in their Umbro design being the addition of stripes to the reverse. Something sure to appease traditionalists saddened by the wholesale decision from Adidas to pull those from their entire range last time out.

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Umbro’s designs for 2019 offer excitement

The Gremio effort has had my, somewhat shonky, creative juices flowing. A rapid play around with photoshop to see what their design would look like in our colours produced some interesting results. Specifically for those who have been here slightly longer as it produces a potential kit very much reminiscent of our 2000-02 effort. Could this be what Bob meant by “New vibes and old skool” ? Or are we miles off the pace?

With apologies in advance for the poor quality, this is what comes around after a bit of mouse play and tweaking of the colours. Adding LeoVegas a step too far at this short notice, but you get the general idea. I hope. Whether this is anywhere near the mark remains to be seen, of course. I have no inside knowledge whatsoever on this one and so it is pure guesswork. Yet…you have to start somewhere on the speculation. So why not here?  

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Could this be it? Sponsor aside. Gremio become Brentford

Next up, Liverpool. Even the most curmudgeonly amongst us has to admit that was quite exciting last night. Turning around a 3-0 deficit whilst shorn of some world class talent was nothing short of spectacular. Barcelona very much second to everything and playing the stereotypical hare to the Anfield tortoise.

That said, sometimes even tortoises can come out with smiles on their faces and this game  was very much the quintessential example. One can only be thankful it was on BT Sport so we were spared the sights and sounds of Jamie Carragher’s verbal ejaculation of his team’s performance.

However incredible the victory was, it did raise a few questions. Has this out-miracled the Miracle of Istanbul? Have Liverpool shot their bolt early, leaving Ajax to clean up in the final? Do we need to update our Anfield bingo cards to factor in the Barcelona game and, if so, what specific squares should be added?  

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Updates now needed. But which?

Say what you want about last night, exciting though it was (and it was), this still came second to possibly the greatest comeback of all time. Brentford at Burton Albion back in 2017. 3-1 down after the half became 5-3 to The Bees just 45 minutes later. We didn’t need 90 minutes to pull this one out the fire.

Barcelona are good, sure, but Burton Albion on a cold afternoon is another challenge altogether.  And I bet you Divock Origi didn’t get the train home with supporters like Sergi Canos did afterwards.     

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Sergi gets the train home after THE comeback

Next up, Mark Warburton. It looks like things are happening at the other end of the 237 bus route. Word on the street being that he has already been appointed and it is merely a case of waiting for the ink to dry before he is officially named as the new manager of… QPR.

Oh my word. Are you serious? If this is the case, then firstly I’ll offer him good luck on taking over at the definition of a crisis club. No money. No players. Any talent they do have is sure to leave over the summer. Closer to home though, there’s the small matter of his history at Griffin Park. Martin Rowlands has become infamous for what he did whilst Jake Bidwell has become something of a joke figure. As much for being skinned alive time and again as the awful #JakeJoins Twitter campaign when he signed.

We all know what Warbs did. For that, every Brentford fan is eternally grateful. His return with Nottingham Forest (fashion choice aside, where he ended up looking like an extra from TV’s The Brittas Empire) was a cordial and respectful one. Should the news be confirmed today, I’d expect next time around to be very different indeed.

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Mark Warburton – won at football but lost at fashion.

And I can’t wait….

Finally, Brentford released the names of those players who will not be offered a new contract when their current deals expire at the end of June. The news about Yoann Barbet, no matter how sad for the fans, was expected after being confirmed by both Thomas Frank and the player himself. Likewise, we say goodbye to Jack Bonham, Lewis Macleod and Josh McEachran. These were hardly unexpected yet the one real surprise was the decision not to take up the option on Moses Odubajo.  Fans seemed genuinely shocked at this and moreso given some of his performances since rejoining the club last season.

Yet the presence of Henrik Dalsgaard, (theoretically) Josh Clarke and the burgeoning relationship between Sergi Canos in the wing back role mean this was , perhaps, inevitable. No matter how much of a shock on the surface. Let’s not forget, either, that the door can swing both ways. On a personal note I’m sad to see Moses and Yoann leave. No question. Yet, as was noted yesterday, the moment to start really trusting our Directors of Football happened a long time ago. No matter how strange some decision may seem up front, wider long-term context is what this club is all about. I wouldn’t be surprised if there are more to follow but I’d also bet my life on new faces turning up over the summer.

If nothing else, Mr. Benham has started dropping clues again….

Nick Bruzon

Are we going for gold? Black, yellow or brown? Kitman Bob drops huge clue in Twitter strip tease.

3 May

And then things started to happen. The EFL have named the date on which the game between Bolton and Brentford will be played. Supposedly. This Tuesday, the same evening that our B team host Manchester City and so there goes the chance to play the kids as had been widely touted. Elsewhere, social media proved king once more as Kitman Bob started answering fan questions about next season’s kit, dropping some pretty big clues in the process.

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Has Bob started pointing the way to 2019/20?

First up, Bolton. The game is supposedly going to happen this Tuesday in the deadzone between the season ending and the play-offs starting. It clashes with our own fixture at home to Manchester City B – always a big draw – whilst also means casual fans will now find themselves further torn as any hopes for a clear run to see Barcelona complete their Champions League rout against Liverpool now have some serious competition. Messi or Maupay ? Sergi or Suarez? I know, I know.

Except, of course, I still can’t see how the game will go ahead. The EFL ‘demanding’ it is one thing but even their own statement notes that, “The Board also discussed the potential of Bolton Wanderers being placed into Administration and took the view if that was to happen, the EFL would not insist the game be played.” They go on to add that “we would advise all supporters to wait until the details for the game are confirmed by the Club before making any travel arrangements”. Meanwhile Brentford official have also advised that they “Will continue to update fans on all issues surrounding this game as often as possible in the coming days.

So clear as mud, then. The game will take place this Tuesday (it is now Friday). Except the advice from the EFL is that it might not and supporters shouldn’t make any arrangements as yet. A situation more farcical given there’s no train home after the game finishes (unless you want to hang around until 1am for the bus to Manchester and the 5 o’clock service to London) . Virgin rail and hotels are expensive enough as it is, let alone when you have to book at a moment’s notice.

Would this even allow the club time to lay on supporters’ coaches?  Would health and safety / policing allow for a game to be set up at short notice? More so one which may not even happen. What about the players who should now be on well -earned breaks? There will be more to follow, no doubt, including what I still expect to be an award of three points to Brentford.

On to matters more appealing, Twitter was awash with talk of next season’s kit yesterday. Something further compounded by EFL Championship supporter of the year, 98 year old Audrey Baker, gifting our Junior Bees an embroidered gold scarf in her role as patron of the Junior membership schemes. It is a most generous and timely present, moreso given our own recent recognition as a gold standard family club. These are smart as and I’m seriously tempted to get the ‘Jimmmy Krankie’ costume from out of the special cupboard in order to try and blag one of the white and gold beauties on Sunday.

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What a gesture for our young fans

Yet as well as being a wonderful gift, it got fans wondering if this was a hint as to next season’s away colour scheme. Moreso when Kitman Bob started doing what he only he can do – going rogue on Twitter (in the nicest possible sense).

He had already told us that our 2019/20 effort would promise “New vibes and old skool” (although was that home, away or both?) whilst the release date could be imminent given, “I think there is an agreement to announce it a few days after the Preston game. “

Then Audrey did the scarf thing and that was it. Bob did what only he, Brentford and Matthew Benham can get away with – chucking out clues into cyberspace and even offering fans a choice of an easy, medium or hard one. Name me any other club or kitman that does this? I love it. Moreso, when the tease offered up to supporters seemed, at first glance, eminently gettable. Or should that be Eminemly gettable? :

Let’s start with a easy-clue then. Famous US Rapper had a massive hit with this.😁😁😁

Get in. I’ve solved this one already. Quite possibly. The clue in the scarf is there already. It has to be Kanye West – Gold Digger. Surely?

Or does it? Bob appeared to pour cold water on that speculation.  “White gold. Kitmans nightmare !  Gold is nice though 😀” . A double bluff or something that is being ruled out purely on cleanliness grounds?

Moving on, Wiz Khalifa – Black and Yellow – seemed the popular consensus. It makes sense for so many reasons and has always been popular. Who could forget the Bathroom shopfront  launch of our 2011-12 beauty whilst I’m still a sucker for the version worn on the road in our first Championship campaign after promotion.

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We’ve got good form here .

Then it hit me. People have missed the obvious one. Hidden in plain sight. We all love the Jaffa Cake kit. All of us. How about more of the same? It’s so obvious when you think about it. DJ Khaled – Brown paper Bag. YESSS!!!! Another season of the brown / orange or similar. It was a fact fact further, definitely compounded by Bob’s subsequent musing “Why has everyone gone for Wiz 🤔🤔🤔”   .

So there you have it. We’re going brown again. Definitely brown.  Not gold and white or black and yellow.

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Too obvious? Or will it be Wiz?

Yet there was more intrigue thrown out there with the other clue offered out by Bob. Namely that, “There maybe  more than one away kit …..” .

Three kits? Does this mean that, in the final season in our current home, Brentford could be going for something special from the historical locker? We did this before in 2004/05 with the away kit commemorating 100 years at Griffin Park. Perhaps something similar is in the offing? Once can only hope that is the case.

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Something historic this way comes?

Whilst we’re all making educated guesses, ultimately nobody knows for sure. The technical sponsor is still not public knowledge although the kit nerd in me is desperate for Umbro, would love the nostalgia of Hummel and can see the unique situation of personalised shirts that would come with New Balance and their NB logo . No doubt it’ll end up being somebody like Macron, whose latest Stoke City effort is about as safe as they come – with some very unusual collars….

The only way to know for sure will be when the club top brass allow Bob to get his kits out. Come on Mr. Benham. Please, put us out of our misery.

Nick Bruzon