Who has the best ever Bees moustache? Who is this year’s new entrant?

With Brentford now having a few days to wait until  we resume Championship action with Friday’s night’s TV game against Fulham, there’s time to look at a few things from the archives. Specifically with a top ‘XI’ that is a blatant rip off of a column published two years ago (albeit with one new entrant). Yet I make no apologies as it is for a great cause.

Today, November 1st, sees the beginning of the Movember campaign. Men in your place of work, your home or even Griffin Park will be undertaking that toughest of challenges – growing a moustache. Some will carry it off with all the prowess of flamboyant Queen frontman Freddie Mercury or Tom Selleck in his Magnum heyday; many will end up with barely perceptible wisps. Often, at a totally different colour to the hair on their head. Yet whatever the results, it is all being done to raise funds and awareness about men’s health – primarily the battles against testicular and prostate cancer.

Somebody near you will be engaged in this challenge and so, please, don’t look on them with scorn or disdain. Instead, why not dig deep? Nobody grows a moustache on purpose…

Yet this wasn’t always the way. Looking through the historical archives shows us how common a practice this once was at Brentford. With many people taking up Movember’s  charitable baton, what better way to recognise their forthcoming battle with bum fluff than by reviewing the top ten of moustaches sported by Brentford players through the ages.

This is a totally non-scientific study based on nothing more than personal opinion of moustache quality rather than playing ability. And so with apologies to any noticeable omissions, let’s kick things off….

10 – Roger Stanislaus. The classy left back opted for an equally classy moustache. It takes a brave man to try and carry this off but Roger did it with ease.

Forget ‘what happened next’. Remember the class

9 – Andy Ansah. These days better known for his wonderful Tekkers, in his youth Andy was as famed for his pace as he was for this effort.

Ansah – always displayed wonderful tekkers

8 – Steve Phillips. Was the goal machine from the late 70’s a possible inspiration on none other than Gary Blissett ten years later? Note the similarity in strike rates and facial hair.

The original Gary Blissett?

7 – John Smeulders. The first of three goalkeepers to make the list. Despite only a handful of appearances, his name lives on forever in the pantheon of mustachioed Bees legends.

Smeulders – played with style

6 – Gary Phillips. Another goalkeeper and another quality moustache. Little evidence of this, at least in Brentford colours, exists on the Internet. However, once seen it was never forgotten. Mercuryesque.

a photo as fuzzy as his moustache

5 – Chris Kamara. Like Andy Ansah, Chris is as well known these days for his TV work. But Chris also displayed unceasing loyalty to his moustache – something that continued throughout his playing career and can still be seen this very day. An unbelievable effort.

Unbelievable, Jeff

4 – Gordon Phillips. Was it compulsory to go for the Tom Selleck look if you played for Brentford and were a Phillips? Our third goalkeeper and third player to carry that surname, Gordon is easily the best of that group – moreso as he offsets this with a fantastic pair of sideburns.

Clean sheets but not clean shaven. Wonderful

3 – Gary Blissett. A goalscoring hero to many. A moustache icon to more. How many players can say they sealed a Championship, knocked their beloved Manchester City out of the FA Cup and even ended up in goal a few times – all despite the extra pressure of maintaining finely groomed facial hair? Seen here with former Bees commercial manager, Matt Davis.

Bliss – a hero to many. Then and now

2 – Wayne Turner. Sometimes words are not enough. Just let the picture do the talking.

Move over Terry Thomas

1 – Gordon Sweetzer. I wasn’t fortunate enough to remember seeing Gordon play and so I take a quote from Andy McCulloch to describe his on pitch personality:

““Gordon, now he would go through a brick wall. He was just crazy. He got terribly injured at times. He was a bit like me in a way – he went for things he shouldn’t have. Probably should have stepped back but you can’t with that sort of desire”.

Imagine, as a defender, that bearing down on you but with the added quality of Brentford’s best ever moustache. Absolute class.

Sorry Bliss, Chris and Wayne. Beaten by a worthy champion

Before we go, any football team needs 11 players.  Whilst he may not have made it into the top ten, there is one man at the club who transcends all style. Who has shown over the years that the moustache is still a tradition (albeit a lot less prevalent) which can be carried off by today’s modern players.

At 11, rather than his traditional 7(seven) none other than Sam Saunders.

Just imagine finding this in your Panini stickers 

 

And if anybody  would like to find out more about this year’s Movember campaign or even participate then you can do so here.

Nick Bruzon

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Barcelona lose the plot as Sam wins Twitter for German Bees

Brentford are in Germany. FC Barcelona have totally lost the plot. Sam Saunders has come out with the all time best ever tweet. Those are pretty much the highlights from a day that saw The Bees travelling to their summer training camp.

As at the time of writing (Sunday 7am), we are still waiting on the first entry from Peter Gilham’s tour diary to bring us up to speed on the latest from the squad. Whilst it’s probably a bit early to expect him to be putting pen to paper, at least there was plenty out there yesterday to keep us updated on social media.

I believe ‘Snapchat’ may have pictures whilst both @BrentfordFC Twitter and the hashtag #GermanyBees are the place for further information and images. Likewise do check the club figures where, amongst others, Kitman Bob has been on his usual prolific form.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I have no idea who drives Brentford ‘official’. Is it an individual, a shared responsibility or ‘car keys in a bowl’ to see who gets the password? However, it definitely seems to have been on the up in recent months following some of those earlier dabbles with, what we’ll politely call, dubious hashtags (hopefully the likes of #trophyfriends and #bignewambitions will remain nothing but an odd memory).

Yesterday saw the ‘good’ side of official continue with, amongst other things, a series of photos that surely provide the basis for a caption competition in weeks to come.

This, being my particular favourite – both for the image and the curiosity as to what had elicited such a response.

If anybody has any suggestions/captions then please feel free to add as a comment and we’ll print them tomorrow.

“I even saw one guess that we’ll be playing in red and white stripes next season”

If Brentford are on good form with Twitter (and hold on Sam Saunders fans, we will get there) it would be fair to say that over in Spain things aren’t going quite so well. The famous terrace chant may once have declared us to be : The Barcelona of the lower leagues but the Catalan Giants seem hellbent on rebranding themselves the Brentford of La Liga. When it comes to hashtags, that is.

With the story of multi-millionaire Lionel Messi being found guilty of tax evasion this week, heavily fined and sentenced to 21 months in jail (a term he will not have to serve ??!) all over the media, Barca have looked to do something to counter the stories and subsequent rumours flying around. However, what they have come out with is something utterly disrespectful to anybody how has ever worked a day in their life (assuming they’ve paid their tax).

Rather than hold up his hands to say, “Sorry, it’s a far cop guv, you’ve got me bang to rights” they’ve gone the other way. Supporters have been asked to show their support by posting a message or photo with both hands open, accompanied by the hashtag : #WeAreAllLeoMessi

I’m not sure what support they expect people to be offering a convicted fraudster. Surely now is the time for a spot of contrition or just lying low? Even the choice of phrase had a rather distasteful similarity to the ‘Je Suis Charlie’ reference that helped people show unity after the January 2015 terrorist attacks in France. When Jimmy Carr suddenly has the moral high ground in the tax evasion stakes then you know things are bad.

Personally, I followed their request to the letter and came up with this.

Per @FCBarcelona : Use hashtag #WeAreAllLeoMessi and post a photo with both hands open. Ok, if you insist… pic.twitter.com/MOL9LmUvES

— Nick Bruzon (@NickBruzon) July 9, 2016

It wasn’t just me. The response to #We AreAllLeo Messi was almost universally scathing. If you are bored today then do take a look at the hashtag to see the latest. Failing that, here are but a smattering  :

How is the hashtag #WeAreAllLeoMessi trending? I thought the majority of the population pay tax.

— John (@johnthemascot) July 9, 2016

 

If you're reluctant to pay tax on your half million pounds per week. This is the hashtag for you! #WeAreAllLeoMessi https://t.co/a2QjeMO3Pe

— Adam Devlin (@ad_I_am) July 9, 2016

#WeAreAllLeoMessi – Oh wait, we’re not, because we pay our taxes and he quite clearly doesn't. He’s not the victim. Shameful from Barcelona.

— Liam Canning (@OffsideLiam) July 9, 2016

from now on, this will be known as the tax evader emoji 🤗 #WeAreAllLeoMessi

— Jack Grimse (@JackGrimse) July 9, 2016

If #WeAreAllLeoMessi, why am I eating 2-day-old pizza leftovers out of the fridge?

— Howler Magazine (@whatahowler) July 9, 2016

All good, but for a Bees related slant this one nails it for me:

It comes to something when #brentfordfc aren't responsible for a shit hashtag #WeAreAllLeoMessi

— Mr Gray (@DeloreanGray) July 9, 2016

And relax.

“Oh Sammy Saunders you are the love of my life. Oh Sammy Saunders I’d let you (have relations with) my wife.”

Not my words but… Actually, they are my words along with those of close to 10,000 other Brentford supporters in honour of the perma-tanned wing-wizard, swim short magnate and terrace hero. Week in, week out the song is sung to our wonderful number 7 (seven). And rightly so.

So despite all the Barcelona related nonsense on twitter yesterday, it was none other than Sam who pretty much closed the social media network down as any form of contest.

This, when asked for some inspirational words ahead of a supporter’s impending nuptials…

@samsaunders7 best m8 gets wed 2day,massive bees fan,cld u send back a msge 4me 2read in me speech please?

— TomPDavies (@Tom_P83) July 9, 2016

Now she's your wife remember "the song" now applies 😂👍🏻 https://t.co/qofhJ2CEXR

— Sam Saunders (@samsaunders7) July 9, 2016

I can’t beat that. Nobody can. We may aswell just give it up now. Peter Gilham has got a tough act following Sam when his tour diary comes out.

Nick Bruzon 

And finally…. :   The Last Word ‘season review’ : Ready. Steady. Go Again and the three year anthology : The Bees are going up remain available for download. For all the info, the highs, the lows, more highs then  you can do so now.

Its been a wonderful three years. Here’s to more of the same over 2016/17. Thanks, as ever, for reading.

With just six to go, is the unthinkable actually possible ?

Brentford take on Nottingham Forest today, knowing another win will really lock up our position in the play off zone and, with Watford hosting Middlesbrough, possibly even send us on a late surge towards the ‘automatic’ places in the Championship table with just six games left to play.

To read the rest of this article, season 2014/15 is now available to download onto Kindle (and other electronic reading device) in full. Containing additional material and even some (poor) editing, you can get it here for less than the cost of a Griffin Park matchday programme or Balti Pie.

Thanks for reading and all your comments over the course of the season. For now, I need to make more space on the site for any follow up. However, ‘close season’ will continue in full, further on.

A packed house, including 6000+ Bees, saw the 4-1 win at Fulham on Friday . More of the same today would be superb

Jota lotta goals as Dallas gives Fulham a shoewing

No apologies for dreadful wordplay. Waking up on Saturday morning, off the back of Brentford’s 4-1 victory at Fulham, that’s how excited I still feel. Yesterday’s result from Craven Cottage was, quite frankly, beyond the dreams of most Brentford fans before kick off as Fulham were left on the wrong end of what the BBC have declared as a thrashing.

To read the rest of this article, season 2014/15 is now available to download onto Kindle (and other electronic reading device) in full. Containing additional material and even some (poor) editing, you can get it here for less than the cost of a Griffin Park matchday programme or Balti Pie.

Thanks for reading and all your comments over the course of the season. For now, I need to make more space on the site for any follow up. However, ‘close season’ will continue in full, further on.

View from the terrace – Stuart Dallas and fans celebrate at 2-0

There were all sorts of inflatables – even a plastic club…….

I had ‘that’ theme tune stick in my head all evening

4 goals, 42 shots, 74% possession. That’s some mathematical model.

Brentford blew aside Blackpool like a crisp packet caught on the breeze as they recorded a second win in as many games. The 4-0 scoreline does little to reflect the one sided nature of a game in which we registered 42 shots to the visitors 2 and had 74% possession. Blackpool, who spent much of the game with ten men following a red card for Charles Dunne, offered nothing and, being honest, could have made the long journey home on the wrong end of a bracketing had we been that bit more clinical.

To read the rest of this article, season 2014/15 is now available to download onto Kindle (and other electronic reading device) in full. Containing additional material and even some (poor) editing, you can get it here for less than the cost of a Griffin Park matchday programme or Balti Pie.

Thanks for reading and all your comments over the course of the season. For now, I need to make more space on the site for any follow up. However, ‘close season’ will continue in full, further on.

The BBC stats show just how one sided it was

View from the terrace – Jon Toral, team and fans celebrate his third goal

However, I have a picture that suggests that there is an alternative which could keep both parties happy. If Matthew wants a mathematical model then our artist’s impression of how this could be accommodated would, I am sure, be a popular one.

Is this what Matthew means by a mathematical model?

Will it be three more points as Blackpool go West?

Brentford welcome Blackpool to Griffin Park on Tuesday night in what, on paper, seems an excellent chance to continue on our winning way after Saturday’s splendid 3-1 victory over Bournemouth. With the Tangerines already 12 points adrift of Championship safety and manager Lee Clark telling the BBC that he “may struggle to fill the substitutes’ bench” surely this has three points written all over it?

To read the rest of this article, season 2014/15 is now available to download onto Kindle (and other electronic reading device) in full. Containing additional material and even some (poor) editing, you can get it here for less than the cost of a Griffin Park matchday programme or Balti Pie.

Thanks for reading and all your comments over the course of the season. For now, I need to make more space on the site for any follow up. However, ‘close season’ will continue in full, further on.

Crisis? What crisis?

Normal service was resumed on Saturday at Griffin Park as Brentford’s 3-1 victory over Bournemouth saw the Bees back to winning ways once more. It was almost as though the previous ten days hadn’t happened – the only difference being the absence of sporting director Frank McParland who was tending to his leeks or whatever else it is you do on gardening leave. Brentford were, simply, magnificent.

To read the rest of this article, season 2014/15 is now available to download onto Kindle (and other electronic reading device) in full. Containing additional material and even some (poor) editing, you can get it here for less than the cost of a Griffin Park matchday programme or Balti Pie.

Thanks for reading and all your comments over the course of the season. For now, I need to make more space on the site for any follow up. However, ‘close season’ will continue in full, further on.

Aswell as 35 yard shots, Brentford also try the ‘lining up for a bus’ dead ball technique

Visiting supporters were in jubilant mood before kick off

For a game given the tongue-in-cheek nickname of ‘The tin pot derby’ by supporters of both clubs (as a reaction to the jealous jibes of our, supposedly, more illustrious divisional rivals), it was one played out with all the passion of the FA Cup final. But there is nothing ‘tinpot’ about either of these sides and the celebrations on full time certainly felt like Brentford had won that famous old trophy.

Jota has his eyes on the tinpot

Tinpot derby awaits a reunited Brentford

Finally. We can concentrate on playing football again rather than talking about the manager and mathematical models. Brentford welcome Bournemouth to Griffin Park today for a promotion six pointer that, should the Bees triumph, will really lock things up once more.

To read the rest of this article, season 2014/15 is now available to download onto Kindle (and other electronic reading device) in full. Containing additional material and even some (poor) editing, you can get it here for less than the cost of a Griffin Park matchday programme or Balti Pie.

Thanks for reading and all your comments over the course of the season. For now, I need to make more space on the site for any follow up. However, ‘close season’ will continue in full, further on.

An unusual derby awaits

Hu-ra-ra Dougie’s in

Is the ghost of #trophyfriends back to haunt us?

I wasn’t going to bother today. Monday morning should see us easing into the week and reflecting on a job, and month, very well done. Brentford sit third in the Championship table after that historic run of victories that saw wins over Derby, Nottingham Forest, Millwall, Fulham and Wolves.

Then I had my attention drawn

To read the rest of this article, season 2014/15 is now available to download onto Kindle (and other electronic reading device) in full. Containing additional material and even some (poor) editing, you can get it here for less than the cost of a Griffin Park matchday programme or Balti Pie.

 Thanks for reading and all your comments over the course of the season. For now, I need to make more space on the site for any follow up. However, ‘close season’ will continue in full, further along.

Ansah, Kamara, Bliss. Who has the best ever Bees moustache?

With Brentford now having the best part of two weeks off until we resume League Action against Fulham, it’s time to look at a few things from the archives. And with many people taking up the charitable baton offered this November, or should I say Movember, what better way to recognise it than by reviewing the top ten of moustaches sported by Brentford players through the ages.

This is a totally non-scientific study based on nothing more than personal opinion of moustache quality rather than playing ability. And so with apologies to any noticeable omissions, let’s kick things off….

10 – Roger Stanislaus. The classy left back opted for an equally classy moustache. It takes a brave man to try and carry this off but Roger did it with ease.

Forget ‘what happened next’. Remember the class

9 – Andy Ansah. These days better known for his wonderful Tekkers, in his youth Andy was as famed for his pace as he was for this effort.

Ansah – always displayed wonderful Tekkers

8 – Steve Phillips. Was the goal machine from the late 70’s a possible inspiration on none other than Gary Blissett ten years later? Note the similarity in strike rates and facial hair.

The original Gary Blissett?

7 – John Smeulders. The first of three goalkeepers to make the list. Despite only a handful of appearances, his name lives on forever in the pantheon of mustachioed Bees legends.

Smeulders – played with style

6 – Gary Phillips. Another goalkeeper and another quality moustache. Little evidence of this, at least in Brentford colours, exists on the Internet. However, once seen it was never forgotten. Mercuryesque.

A photo as fuzzy as his moustache

5 – Chris Kamara. Like Andy Ansah, Chris is as well known these days for his TV work. But Chris also displayed unceasing loyalty to his moustache – something that continued throughout his playing career and can still be seen this very day. An unbelievable effort.

Unbelievable, Jeff

4 – Gordon Phillips. Was it compulsory to go for the Tom Selleck look if you played for Brentford and were a Phillips? Our third goalkeeper and third player to carry that surname, Gordon is easily the best of that group – moreso as he offsets this with a fantastic pair of sideburns.

Clean sheets but not clean shaven. Wonderful

3 – Gary Blissett. A goalscoring hero to many. A moustache icon to more. How many players can say they sealed a Championship, knocked their beloved Manchester City out of the FA Cup and even ended up in goal a few times – all despite the extra pressure of maintaining finely groomed facial hair? Seen here with Bees supporter and one time Bees commercial manager Matt Davis.

The goal scoring legend never changed his style

2 – Wayne Turner. Sometimes words are not enough. Just let the picture do the talking.

Move over Terry Thomas

1 – Gordon Sweetzer. I wasn’t fortunate enough to remember seeing Gordon play and so I take a quote from Andy McCulloch to describe his on pitch personality:

““Gordon, now he would go through a brick wall. He was just crazy. He got terribly injured at times. He was a bit like me in a way – he went for things he shouldn’t have. Probably should have stepped back but you can’t with that sort of desire”.

Imagine, as a defender, that bearing down on you but with the added quality of Brentford’s best ever moustache. Absolute class.

Sorry Bliss, Chris and Wayne. Beaten by a worthy champion

It wouldn’t be a full football team without eleven players and so I’ll reach out to the terraces for our bonus addition. But before I do, if anybody is feeling generous and would like to donate to this year’s Movember campaign (raising funds to fight prostate and testicular cancer) then you can do so here.

Any sized donation would be gratefully accepted and help keep yours truly out of the dog house, where my own attempt to join this elite group is becoming somewhat of an embarrassment.

Face of the fans – Glenn Joyce. Glenn is a familiar face around Griffin Park – and as much for his ongoing devotion to facial hair. Pictured here with Terry Evans, the man mountain may stand head and shoulders above him but not when it comes to moustache growth.

Terry is in good company