Kit news. We have kit news. Of sorts. Plus a bright and breezy romp…

Even years are fab. Odd ones suck. 2016 – saw the Euros and the Olympics. 2018 – has the World Cup. 2017 – nothing . Absolutely nothing. What one New Road observer described to me yesterday as ‘A sports wasteland’. Unless you like Andy Murray. But then we get that every year. For football / Brentford fans a long, hard summer awaits. We’ve a 35 day wait until we can see the lads in vaguely meaningful action (the game at Aldershot) whilst the visit of Southampton is, as it stands, the only pre-season action announced at Griffin Park

Indeed, looking at the key dates between now and August when the Bees continue Championship life, it really does seem like a case of slim pickings. At least if you need your football fix.

Dates for the diary – 2017/18.

Father’s Day: 18th June
Sky Bet EFL fixtures are revealed: 21st June 2017
Aldershot Town: away 7th July
Oxford United: away 19th July
Southampton: home 22nd July
MK Dons: away 25th July
Sky Bet EFL season begins: 5th August 2017 (subject to TV)

35 days?? That’s more than a month.

All pretty standard fare, really. But why Father’s day? This is no unsubtle hint from yours truly. Mrs B normally does a great job on that front (although if anybody is struggling for an idea then there’s a book I could recommend…).

If football action is thin on the ground, then so are updates about our new kit for 2017/18. It’s been tumbleweed out there. I am, as ever, desperate to find out how we’ll be looking next season. Thick stripes? Thin stripes? Collars? Long sleeves (please, Adidas. Please). Will the away be the green we discussed so much last season? What about yellow/black – a combination that proved incredibly popular in the recent poll to discuss our best ever shirt to feature the previous crest? Or a return to ‘traditional’ two-tone blue?

Likewise, how we are going to launch next season’s effort? Incredible though it was to get the supporters involved last time around (and I can only thank the club, yet again, on that front) nobody is yet to surpass Blackburn Rovers and their ‘Birdy’s Date’ video. I’ve said that before and I will say it again. Probably every season going, at least until we make our own equivalent – Buzzette’s Date, anyone?

Players and fans were all involved last time around

Yet for all my supposition, there has been nothing out there. With Brentford understandably focussing on season tickets at present, why would we make distractions on that front? Equally, with clubs now launching shirts every day (Southampton and Alan McCormack’s Luton Town amongst the most recent to go with stunning ‘away’ efforts – do check them out, especially the Saints which is very ’80’s Brentford) one does have to wonder when it will be our turn?

Fellow kit enthusiast/nerd/obsessive Luis Adriano has been on the case though. Taking to Twitter, he put the question to Mark Devlin this week. As ever, our Chief Executive was quick to reply giving the slightest of clues…..

For a mate! Sure, Luis. Sure 🙂

So Father’s Day is on the calendar in the Bruzon household. Although not just for the traditional reasons this season. Mark / Kitman Bob, if you are reading (stranger things have happened) any more clues would be gratefully accepted…..

The other traditional thing at this time of year is the plugging of the season review e-book. Please. Stay with me – this time around it is for a great cause . All funds raised are being given to the Brentford FC Community Sports Trust. Likewise, any subsequent sales from the previous versions.

Containing the least bad of the blogs from May 2016 to May 2017 and a bit of new material too, you can pick it up, here. It’s all for a great cause and,hey, you may even enjoy it.

“A bright and breezy romp…. this is a cheap and worthwhile read.” They aren’t my words but those of sometime Bees Player pundit and ‘Ahead of the game’ author Greville Waterman.

So PLEASE. Do something great to help our club. What else will £1.99 get you? What better way to spend some time on the commute to work, the beach, by the pool or even hiding out in the toilet at work (or is that just me?).

In all seriousness, I need to give a HUGE thanks to everybody who has downloaded this so far. Likewise, those who have helped give it a nudge – the players, Beesotted and West London’s Premier Journalist Tom Moore amongst others.

For less than the cost of half a pint on match day, it’s the season review that has been designed to fit in your pocket (if you are using an i-phone).

If nothing else, Father’s Day is approaching. Just saying….

Out now – for a great cause

Nick Bruzon

ITV almost nail it on a stunning first night. Almost…

EURO 2016 has begun! What a night in Paris as things finally got under way with the hosts taking on Romania. Over the next four weeks, the Last Word goes a touch continental. Well, as continental as you can from a sofa in front of the TV in Brentford. Much as I’d love to be joining the likes of Billy and Dave from Beesotted in France, this is as close as it gets. I’ll leave the Russian hooligans, drunken England fans, Marseille ultras and reactive police to them ( their site is sure to be a very interesting place over the next few weeks). Instead, as ever, we look as much at ‘the other stuff’ as the serious

7pm, Friday night. Here we go. It’s an hour until kick off. Beer in hand, sofa groaning and remote control in hand. ITV, here we come….

But no. It wasn’t football. With the tournament due to start in 59 minutes, instead of Gallic charm I got Emmerdale Farm. Instead of Glen Hoddle I had a drunk driving a JCB into a farm house, followed by some shouting from the woman who used to be Lizzie Conlon in Dream Team.

Wow. People actually watch this for pleasure? Where was Clive Tyldesley when we needed him?

Fifteen minutes later, ITV finally delivered. The mayhem of farming life was replaced by a sumptuous set of opening credits featuring many of the tournament’s big names and Wayne Rooney, vacationing in a series of 20’s style tourism posters.

Buffon was juggling in the kitchen and we even got a cheeky wink from Cristiano Ronaldo in his, brackets free, number 7(seven) sports car.

Ronaldo looking sharp on ITV

And that was just the start.

Cut from there to the slightly less salubrious image of Lee Dixon, Slaven Bilić and Emmanuel Petit. ITV having chosen to switch the traditional studio for a Paris roof top to begin their outside broadcast. Albeit with a wonderful backdrop.

Considering the rain that had gripped the French Capital in recent weeks, it was a brave choice. Moreso given the reaction offered to anybody in football seen within 10 yards of an umbrella.

Since Steve McClaren did his ‘wally with the brolly’ thing for England against Croatia back in 2007, being seen to protect yourself from the elements has been an act akin to being caught with the Super Victor toy in your hand luggage.

ITV had adopted for a pundit’s table that had four legs meant to resemble those of the city’s most famous landmark. A lovely touch until Bilić sat directly in front of it, giving him the appearance of Eiffel Tower legs.

Wonderful backdrop; strange trousers

Cut to the Tower itself, where roving reporters Louis Saha and tennis player Marion Bartoli seemed in what could politely be described as ‘high spirits’. “Allez Les Bleus” exhorted the former Wimbledon champion, in a performance that suggested she may share Maria Sharapova’s medical team. Hey, let’s just say they were both high on life or just drinking in what was clearly an incredible atmosphere.

13 minutes prior to kick off the opening ceremony started. Started! They should have been packing up by this point, not tempting Clive to utter lines such as “The French are famous for their kisses” as an anthropomorphic pair of lips sauntered past the camera.

The central prop, a carousel, was odds-on to have a big reveal. Sure enough, as the can can girls moved on it opened to present none other than Emmanuel Petit, who must have hot footed it down from the ITV rooftop . But no, on closer inspection it was actually Disc Jockey David Guetta, singing along to the songs he was ‘playing’. As one Twitter observer notes, “Where’s Sacha Distel?”

The sheer volume of the home support sining the national anthem and a stunning fly past from the French Air Force really were the cherry on this opening ceremony cake. All we needed was Diana Ross, or perhaps Vanessa Paradis, to miss a penalty for a bingo ‘full house’.

They hadn’t even begun clearing up wit the players came out for the anthems but, incredibly, we were go for ‘8pm’. And then Glen Hoddle opened his mouth.

All the good work ITV had done came crashing down in an instant. Not even a wonderful game of football – and what a winner from Dimitri Payet at the death – could detract for his ongoing banality. The commentating equivalent of the England Supporter’s band. I’d rather have had Lizzie Conlon’s ranting.

Having jettisoned Adrain Chiles, its a shame they still persist with the one time England manager. Perhaps its just me.

A great start to a great tournament but with ITV again tonight for the England – Russia game, let’s hope Wayne proves me wrong and Glenn keeps as quiet as I’d love that band to be.

Nick Bruzon 

Bonus for Bees as Liverpool and Andy Murray need new balls, please

The top of the Championship table locked up that bit closer last night after Bournemouth (whose Eddie Howe was named manager of the month for December) slipped to their second defeat in three January games, this time to Leeds United. All this means that a win for Brentford at Norwich City on Saturday, whilst a big ask, will take us to within two points of the top.

With the Cherries hitting the crossbar with a late penalty (hmm) it was a perhaps unexpected result, being Leeds’ first win in eight games. But whatever the circumstance, even those who blame the Clem like jinx of manager of the month, a Bournemouth defeat only makes the trip to Carrow Road even more interesting than it already was.

The BBC shows how the top eight are pulling away. But can Brentford capitalise ?

It is a trip that will see the Bees bolstered by even more strike power with the news announced yesterday that England under-20 Chris Long has signed on a month’s loan from Everton. Despite not, yet, featuring for their first team this can only be a good thing. Don’t forget, this is the same Everton youth system that has already seen the likes of Jake Bidwell, Adam Forshaw and Conor McAleny make the journey South to Griffin Park.

Chris adds another option up front. Presumably at first, the diminutive striker (5ft6 to 5ft9 depending on where you read) will be used as a change over for Andre Gray. However, being a traditionalist I’m not averse to seeing two men up top and so it is nice to have another chance to mix things up, if needed.

Not only does Chris offer goals but, like Alan Judge, he comes a gift wrapped headline writers dream. I’m already looking forward to Brentford scoring with “A Long shot from two yards out”. Although we’ll happily take one from any distance.

Chris Long – the signing shirt was in evidence yesterday

And being the traditionalist that I am, I was somewhat upset at a missed opportunity last night. Not Sky’s decision to show Everton’s neighbours, Liverpool, in Capital One Cup action against Chelsea rather than the Bournemouth game but, instead, their review of the action in the 10pm newsreel on Sky Sports News.

Don’t get me wrong, I generally love this service although my patience has been tested in recent weeks by the oversize ‘on demand’ logo that continually flashes away on the giant screens behind our hosts’ shoulder. Something as unsightly and distracting as a Steve Evans touchline rant.

However, the show began last night with the Liverpool highlights and an observation that, “The yellow ball was used because of light snow”.

Yellow? Because of snow? Surely it is the universal law of football that snowy conditions = orange ball?

And, whilst the neon yellow monstrosity seems to have become the de facto ball of choice in the winter months, surely it wouldn’t be that hard to honour one football staple that seems to have all but died a death?

Still, one place where yellow balls are to be expected is on the tennis court. So we finish today with a look at a feature being run on the website of the The Guardian newspaper, encouraging readers to design a new logo for Andy Murray. Specifically to honour the 77 years between his Wimbledon victory and the previous British winner.

It isn’t too late to enter and if you’d like “to capture his energy and spirit whilst subtly referencing his affinity with the number 77” (their words) you’ve got a week left to do it here. However, I’d suggest this is one design that, much like British tennis players, probably won’t be appearing on centre court any time soon.

Liverpool may have dropped their balls last night but at least The Guardian readers are grabbing them with relish.

Not appearing on centre court any time soon?

There’s a fine line between quirky and ridiculous

We will get to Brentford but first, Spanish football and the new Cultural Leonesa shirt. If you hadn’t heard of them before then don’t worry, nor had I, but they’ve certainly made a name for themselves with what is possibly the most ridiculous shirt ever.

I hadn’t planned on even giving this the time of day but, such is the impact it seems to have had amongst several of the ‘Last Word’ readership that perhaps I am alone in loathing this? For reasons unknown, they’ve chosen to go for a ‘comedy’ tuxedo-effect design.

Why???

Don’t get me wrong, I love a quirky kit and Spain seem to rule when it comes to these. This season has already seen splendid efforts from Deportivo Lugo – with their lager top (presumably a link to the sponsor) and the Octopus emblazoned fifth kit – although only room for two arms. Likewise, last campaign saw La Hoya Lorca scoop the honours with their broccoli inspired outfit.

At least those two teams were able to call on , albeit tenuous, links to their region’s heritage and sponsor but, short of an Andrew Sachs ‘Spanish Waiter’ tribute (and Leon’s not even that close to Barcelona) , I don’t get the Leonesa effort .

Quirky kits CAN work

As ever, if in doubt take your lead from 007. I love the Roger Moore James Bond films but this pun filled rickshaw chase from Octopussy has to be proof that the Tuxedo and sport (tennis, in this instance) should never mix)

 

Getting back to TW8, this weekend see the first home friendly against Nice on Saturday. It’ll be great to catch the team in action at Griffin Park and then, the following day, to actually meet them.

Sunday sees the annual ‘Family Open Day’ where all the players will be in attendance. This is always a great event and you never know what will happen – last season a chance encounter with Buzz and Buzzette end up on the ‘family ticket’ flier.

Buzzette looking radiant, as ever

The big draw this time round seems to be also centered around kit. Not only will the away shirt be officially launched (I’d still love the club to have gone for a ‘Blackburn style video’) but anybody wearing the new home shirt will have the chance to participate in one large team photo.

As yet, there’s no word on whether tuxedos will be allowed. I doubt it.

And if you can’t wait for the new season, why not catch up on the last one? ‘Celebrating like they’d won the FA Cup…..’ (The story of Brentford’s 2013/14 promotion campaign, amongst other football related chatter) – is now available as a digital book. Featuring the best of the not so bad columns from last season, and some new content, you can download it here for your kindle / digital device.

 

The four simple rules have gone out of the window…

Liverpool – I blame you. And Brentford have had no small part in this either.

The Anfield giants and the boys from Griffin Park seem on a hell bent mission to make that darkest of arts, the football coupon, even harder to win than before (please note bookmakers – the word is accumulator, not a*ca).

It is a particular favourite past-time of mine on those occasions it’s not possible to travel with the Bees to whichever far flung Northern outpost the fixture list has decided is next on our travels.

We all know football. There are only three possible results – home win, away win or draw. What could be simpler than picking a few games, selecting one of these options and then sit back to watch the winnings roll in?

To read the rest of this article, season 2013/14 is now available to download onto Kindle, in full. Containing previously unseen content, you can do so here for less than the cost of one matchday programme.

 Thanks for reading over the course of the campaign. For now I need to make space on this page for any follow up.  The ‘close season’ / World Cup columns continue in full, further on in this site.

Come on BBC, pull your finger out. No sport and no personality

What a disappointing weekend.

Odd sentiments at a time that saw Brentford win, again, as we moved up to third in League One. A period that saw the gap at the top of the table close to a mere four points as the Bees played well into the final moments to further  tighten things up.

I left Griffin Park a happy man on Saturday; Sunday changed all of that.

To read the rest of this article, season 2013/14 is now available to download onto Kindle, in full. Containing previously unseen content, you can do so here for less than the cost of one matchday programme.

 Thanks for reading over the course of the campaign. For now I need to make space on this page for any follow up.  The ‘close season’ / World Cup columns continue in full, further on in this site.