Tag Archives: Derby County

Well that makes #BeeTheDJ nice and easy. The four ‘other’ things you have to know about our new signing

29 May

So the news is now, officially, official. Brentford ‘Official’ confirmed one of the most heavily touted rumours of the week when the signing of midfielder Christian Nørgaard from Italian giants ACF Fiorentina (their words) was confirmed on Tuesday morning. But what do we know about the latest addition to the squad with the signing of a player who was, of course, one of Thomas Frank’s first signings at Brøndby  – what were the odds of the stats computer coming up with his name 😉 ?  As for Leeds United, with the pain of the play-offs still fresh in the mind they’ve given supporters a boost. Even if it does involve that most awful of football phrases….  

We can only begin with the arrival of Christian Nørgaard at Griffin Park. The club website has their own ‘getting to know…’ piece and you can read that one here. Personally though, I prefer to read between the lines at the less obvious facts to see what we can come up with.

Firstly, that all important question of which ‘signing pose’ would Christian opt for has been answered. There was to be no ‘shirt with name on the back’ (new or old) and no ‘pen hovering over contract’. Instead, we were given ‘club scarf’ – worn in the traditional style rather than held aloft.

It’s always a safe option. Moreso given the unfortunate incident of Marcel Eger and the shirt that looked suspiciously too tight. ‘Noooo’ screamed anyone at a time the player should have absolutely opted to hold rather than wear.

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Christian plays it safe with a scarf around the neck

The article in which his signing is announced refers to Christian as “The tall 25-year-old”. As one Braemar Road observer pointed out, this is a nice throwback to the club’s oft repeated description of “Long-legged midfielder Toumani Diagouraga”. One fan’s long-legged is another’s tall, I suppose.

According to the aforementioned ‘ten things’ piece, whilst at Brøndby Christian was described by Sporting Director Troels Bech as the “liaison between the team and this club’s wonderful fans.” This is great news, given the already strong bond between players and fans that we bore witness to under Thomas Frank. Those post-match laps of honour at the latter end of the season really helping crank up the emotion after another three points had been earned. If he does half as good a job as the likes of Yoann, Said, Neal or our official player liaison, the legend that is Peter Gilham, then we’re in for a treat.

As for songs, popular music’s The Vaccines give us an absolute shoe-in for #BeeTheDJ. And should Emiliano Marcondes cede his number 17 squad shirt then I can’t see it beyond the wit of mortal man or woman to come up with an alternate terrace chant, either.

An obvious selection

Moving on, Leeds United. I’m still amazed at quite how they managed to miss out on promotion to the Premier League this time around. Automatic was in their grasp for so long whilst even in the play-offs, they were all set in the second leg after that early goal from Stuart Dallas before hitting self-destruct just before half time against rank Lampard’s Derby County ™. Still, that’s all been and gone. Crying over it won’t change anything. Another campaign in the Championship awaits at Elland Road.

As such, one can imagine the joy after the club confirmed that head coach Marcelo Bielsa will be at the helm for another season. Leeds United chairman Andrea Radrizzani has exercised their option to extend Bielsa’s contract for a second season whilst the man himself has confirmed his intention to continue.

I think Bielsa is great. We’ve written about him many times on these pages and even in the matchday programme. Even though his team would ultimately miss out, one can’t deny the passion he displayed and the enjoyment he gave us over 2018/19. And not just Spygate.

So it was news which I read with genuine pleasure. Until the formal announcement was pointed out. Urghh. They’ve used ‘that phrase’. We go again. I can’t help but associate this with Harlee Dean and his Twitter account – usually used in conjunction with the phrases “Can’t apologise enough” or “The supporters deserve better”.

It’s a phrase that is high up there on the post-match defeat bingo card, nestling alongside Dean Smith telling journalists that “we deserved to win”. I have a(possibly) irrational loathing of this bland platitude, used to describe the fact that your team has been rubbish. Move along, nothing to see here.  File alongside the England Supporters ‘band’, Mrs. Browns Boys, Team GB, goal music, eXpresso, Star Wars day etc etc in the list of things that really get under the skin

On the plus side, at least there was no crowbarred hashtag to accompany the news whilst the picture used put me in mind of Alan Partridge – which can only ever be a good thing. Unlike the Norwich based superstar, Bielsa has been given that much required second season. Here’s to seeing if he can produce more of that liquid football. although perhaps not at Griffin Park. (Yet) another three points from Leeds will do me just fine.

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Nick Bruzon  

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That was some weekend. But what’s happening today?

28 May

What a weekend! Brentford now know every team we’ll be playing in the Championship next season after Charlton Athletic triumphed in the League One play-off whilst Frank Lampard’s Derby County missed out to Aston Villa in the battle for a Premier League place. There were nothing but good wishes coming out of TW8 for Dean Smith as saw his dream come true in a game that could have gone either way in a frenzied final ten minutes. Back at Griffin Park, we have incoming news following a cryptic late night tweet from Brentford official on Sunday.

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Villa celebrate at Wembley

Love or hate the play-offs, nobody could deny that was the weekend that had it all. From what we could politely call a ‘defensive mix up’ that put Charlton on the back foot within minutes of kick-off to Derby County suffering their own goalkeeping malfunction that allowed the Villans to double the lead. Despite a late surge and the arrival of Flo Jo from the bench, Dean Smith and his team were able to hang on. The smiles at full time said it all. Smiles that we’ve never experienced as the tears on the faces of the Derby and Sunderland fans were a pain that we know all to well.

Screen Shot 2019-05-28 at 06.11.57The bonus of Aston Villa going up means that the Bees already climb a place in the fledgling league table. We’re currently fourth, clear of Leeds United, Fulham and QPR. Newly promoted Charlton are sniffing around the play-offs (not bad for a team that have just gone up) although there’s a shock at the top with both Barnsley and Birmingham City in ‘automatic’. I can’t imagine that will last for too long. Had Derby made it then we’d be sitting in fifth, albeit I can’t imagine Dean Smith would have settled on taking top spot as a palatable alternative.

The other big question from the play-offs was how much Brentford stand to make from Villa going up. What ‘clauses’ (if any) were written into the deal to let Dean go? More importantly, there’s a certain Scott Hogan. Somehow, he has got himself promoted to the Premier League twice in the same season. Officially with Villa and as an on-loan player at Sheffield United. Does this mean we get paid twice? Stranger things have happened.

Waking up this morning, Brentford official have started to prepare the way for some form of news. I say, some. In part this is obvious – we have incoming. The tweet that went up late last night noted : ✍ Announce 9am.

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The pen emoji presumably for a contract being signed rather than to highlight our new rnage of autograph books in the club shop. And if so, every bit of transfer gossip suggest this will be Danish midfielder Christian Nørgaard from Fiorentina. Whilst that bit may be fairly nailed on – if you believe what you read – what still remains uncertain at this moment in time is what form of ‘signing photo’ we are going to get.

The classic ‘pen poised over contract’? How about, ‘Holding a Brentford scarf’ – either aloft or at waist height? Yet perhaps this could a double whammy to link in with the kit launch. Imagine if the new player were to appear with our first look at the Umbro 2019/20 kit? Home or away? Don’t forget that last season, supporter Lucy Draper was given permission to drop the images on to Twitter to formerly launch the kit whilst the arrival of Said Benrahma was first revealed in a video clip to supporter Ryan.

The point being that we like to do things in an unorthodox style. Whilst unlikely (and it may not even be Christian who is joining), until such time as we see the images I won’t rule out the possibility of a new shirt being included.

Just as long as there isn’t a comedy hashtag……

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Is Christian now a Bee?

Nick Bruzon

Derby Does Dallas as Twitter (mostly) lines up to put the boot in. See you next season.

16 May

 

What a missed opportunity. After all the build-up and that gruelling season, when the moment came the chance was spurned. The ball was sitting up to be hit into an open goal yet there wasn’t even a lazy leg wafted in the general direction of the target. With Leeds United conspiring to throw away a two goal advantage against Frank Lampard’s Derby County™ last night, Brentford official have chosen not to wade in to the general Twitter explosion. As supporter Luis Adriano noted….

My word. What an evening. What a game. What a supersonic performance from Derby. What magnificence for the neutral amongst us. What utter horror for Leeds United supporters who have seen their side let a seemingly impregnable position at Christmas slide away and then watched it turn into a choke of Scottish goalkeeping proportions. The quite wonderful Marcelo Bielsa seing his masterplan dissolving in a sea of devastation as the end of season defeat to Wigan and, of course, the whooping handed out by Brentford came back to haunt the Elland Road faithful.

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Sky cameras show a full time that was as devastating as any play-off has ever been

From that moment at Griffin Park they stumbled out of ‘automatic’ and into the play-offs where, despite a first leg advantage earned at Derby County, Saturday’s chants of “Stop crying Frank Lampard” had a somewhat hollow ring as full time was called. And I take no pleasure in saying that after the circumstances of the Rams’ visit to TW8 for April’s 3-3.  

It was a sentiment picked up all around the world where Twitter was awash with comedians lining up to put the boot into Leeds. But you can understand why after a game that had everything which makes the play-offs so compelling yet so brutal.

Despite the heroics of former Brentford star Stuart Dallas, whose early goal gave Leeds a 2-0 aggregate advantage, the home side saw their chances fade away when a horrific mix up between Liam Cooper and ‘keeper Casilla just prior to half-time offered Frank Lampard’s Derby etc etc a lifeline.

From that point on, there was only one team in it. Incredibly, Two more goals for the visitors within fifteen minutes of the restart saw the tie tuned on it’s head. Although that man Dallas restored parity soon after to keep the dream alive, in the end it was the visitors who held their nerve in a quite wonderful final half hour of attacking football. With Leeds down to ten men Jack Marriott did the needful on 85minutes as Derby held on to reach Wembley and a show down with Dean Smith.

What came next was as brutal as we’ve ever witnessed. We’re all used to the scenes of distraught players on the pitch and devastated fans but this was next level misery. Moreso, given the complete lack of sympathy from just about anybody and everybody not connected with Leeds United. As the Derby heroes celebrated, the rest of the football community joined in. Starting with Derby official themselves where some might say that what they did was thoroughly deserved….   

There’s nothing else you can say after that. Except, perhaps, see you next season when I’m sure that a certain song may be requested on #BeeTheDJ ….

Nick Bruzon

Mascot magnificence poses big question. And is this the best football record ever?

15 May

So Brentford now know at least one more team we’ll be playing next season after West Bromwich Albion missed out to Aston Villa in the play-offs. A 1-0 win on the night in a game that our former head coach , not surprisingly, thought his team should have won wasn’t enough to see The Baggies reach Wembley. Frank Lampard’s Derby County ™ and Leeds United do battle this evening for the chance to join them . What price a Leeds – Villa rematch in that one….. More importantly, we have quite wonderful news c/o Matt Dyson on Absolute Radio about what is, quite possibly, the greatest football / music crossover since Hoddle and Waddle.

First up, the play-offs. Aston Villa are through. West Brom aren’t. It was yet another example about how wonderful an experience it is for the winning side aswell as the neutral observers. Conversely, how utterly devastating for those who missed out. I love them and dread them in equal measure yet let’s not pretend it would have been quite wonderful to see Brentford involved last night. Instead, we had to settle for Dean Smith doing his thing.

I’ve all the time in the world for Dean. We’ve written about him on these pages many, many times. Nobody could doubt his enthusiasm or passion. He took Brentford to the position of being joint favourites for the Championship title as recently as October before succumbing to the obvious lure of his boyhood club.

The only gripe being his constant insistence in every post-match press conference that his team ‘deserved to win’ – regardless of whether the game ended in draw, defeat or victory. We saw it at Griffin Park. We’ve seen it with Villa. Even our own three points taken from the Villans back in February saw him repeating those oft heard words following Neal Maupay’s injury time winner, “On the scale of chances, not what we deserve”.

Perhaps it is Dean’s party piece nowadays. As familiar a soundbite and football cliché as the flourish of a Keith Stroud yellow card, mention that ‘The shackles are off’ at Manchester united (even if they seem to have now reattached themselves) or the Rams being rebranded as Frank Lampard’s Derby County ™. And whilst it would be nice if Dean could perhaps change the record, it would be churlish to offer him anything but the hugest congratulations at this juncture. Nobody could deny how he has lifted Aston Villa and taken them to the brink of a top flight return.

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Bingo cards at the ready for the final

The other point of note from last night was a piece of mascot related magnificence. Things don’t get more pressured or stressful than a penalty shoot out. With West Brom looking to compose themselves and prepare for the vital spot kicks, who was that joining the huddle? None other than the club mascot, of course. As you do.  Sadly, the anthropomorphic onlooker was unable to inspire the team as they just missed out.

It also posed the question of what has happened to Boiler Man? Why wasn’t he in the huddle too? Could his absence from this crucial gathering have been the narrow margin between victory and defeat? Who knows. However, should Brentford find themselves in this position in twelve months’ time, then the key fact to note is that both Buzz AND Buzzette must be involved.  

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Get in there

Then, this morning, something even more incredible than Buzzette being caught In flagrante delicto with Boiler Man and Kingsley happened. Petr Cech has only gone and made a record. Yes, that Petr Cech. With drummer, Roger Taylor. From Queen (not Duran Duran).

Entitled ‘That’s Football‘ you can hear it below. Please. Do so. Now. The news was brought to us on The Absolute Radio breakfast show by co-host Matt Dyson and , it has to be said, the record is stunning. Absolutely stunning. So bad it’s amazing.

Described as John Barnes crossed with Kraftwerk, it sees the former Arsenal goalkeeper to produce a quite incredible performance that is, essentially, a list of things that happen at football. All of which are  spoken/delivered in alternate lines by Cech and Taylor.  Think Wiliam Shatner channelling Arnold Schwarzenegger

Victory. Happiness. Glory. Fame.

The Pitch. The Roar. The Crowd. The Score

It could be the best football record ever. And that’s saying something. I’d love to hear this on #BeeTheDJ next season. Better still, what about Brentford running out to this one…..?

Thank you Matt. Thank you Roger. And thank you, Petr.

Nick Bruzon

Off-field matters for Brentford (and Liverpool) provide main talking points ahead of Derby County visit.

6 Apr

There’s not too much to say about on-pitch matters today. With Brentford set to welcome Frank Lampard’s Derby County ™, the hope is a simple one. Please, please, please , pleeeease just be better than the last week’s games at Wigan and Swansea. Even slightly. It’s not that much to ask, is it? Elsewhere, Liverpool got the weekend’s proceedings under way at Southampton last night where they duly returned to the top of the Premier league. Their battle with Manchester City proving as intriguing as the one at the top of the Championship – just who is going to blink first? And once more, Matthew Benham proved why he is the club owner like no other.

Hulk_(comics_character)First up, matters at Griffin Park. Brentford have been like the Incredible Hulk this season. At home, a side that seem permanently set to ‘rampage’ mode. An irrepressible, destructive force beating back all comers as easily as a cat toying with a spider. Yet away from home, we’ve been that other side of his alter-ego, Doctor Bruce Banner. All the right ideas but none of the physical prowess.

Last week was the consummate demonstration of our split personality this campaign (I would also accept: Jekyll and Hyde team). I’m sure there may even be a few supporters wishing we were still bedecked in 2017/2018’s gamma ray green rather than the current brown & orange (best. away kit. ever).

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We did ok in green….

Thankfully, we are back home today. This time around Frank Lampard’s etc etc are the visitors. Even allowing for the traditional Leeds United ‘choke’, automatic promotion is probably an aspiration too far. However, sitting 7th(seventh) in the Championship, Derby still have a quite magnificent chance of making the play-offs. It is no doubt a position they will look to strengthen this afternoon although, as ever, might the pressure of a ‘must win’ game play into our hands?

For Brentford, the season is all but mathematically over. The ten points to sixth place just too big a gap to reel n with just 7(seven) games to go. It’s a massive shame that we hit the skids after having hauled ourselves back into contention but that’s how football works. Consistency is rewarded with league position. The table doesn’t lie (obvious, but….) and unfortunately we’ve not been able to do it on the road this time around.

I saw a stat on the BBC which was a damming indictment of what happened on Tuesday evening at Swansea – namely that the Bees attempted just six shots as we went down 3-0. Our lowest in a league match since performing the same feat  having six against Middlesbrough. That’s one attempt every 15 minutes – not great. To put it mildly.

The plus point from that game is that a reaction must surely be imminent. Thomas Frank pulled no punches after the game and has since used his press-conference to note : “We need to bounce back, everyone can see that.  . Add to that our own form at home combined with the aforementioned knowledge that Derby really have to win and I think we’re going to be going home very happy at 5pm. 

It has been a long, long season but a thrilling one. Mostly. If only we’d been able to pick up few more wins away from home then who knows what might have been? Yet with the nucleus of a wonderful squad at his disposal (for now), should Thomas be allowed / able to keep them together, our final season at Griffin Park could be a most incredible one. Here’s hoping that push starts today.

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View from the Braemar – I’m expecting a happy Thomas at full time.

Moving on. I watched the Southampton – Liverpool game last night. Jürgen Klopp’s team showed a relentlessness that money can’t buy. Despite conceding an early goal from Shane Long (not a typo) they just kept going and going until the points were secured. It was a performance that showed them as Hulk like on their travels as they are at home. Anyway, I’m not here to specifically bang about Liverpool – beyond admiring their travelling form. Such chat usually leads into a rant about the media love in and we end up playing Anfield bingo – tick one of your cards for every reference to the Kop being like a twelfth man, “Glory, glory European nights”, the miracle of Istanbul, Shankley, Paisley, Klopp getting over-excited etc 

Instead, it was more just a chance to tear the hair out in regards Jamie Carragher. Back in the early 2000’s Sky TV had a brief flirtation with the red button option for ‘fan commentary’. Should you have been crazy enough to select this, the reward was a supporter from each club pouring forth on their team and the game in question. It was horrific although, to be fair, still better than Richard Keys and Andy Gray. This ‘service’ was quietly pensioned off but now seems to have returned – specifically in the guise of the former Liverpool defender. 

Oh. My. Word. Could he have been anymore biased? Could he have been any more fanboy? We all know he used to play for Liverpool but plenty of ex-players have made that transition from pitch to commentary box. None have quite matched his level of reminding us all how amazing his former are. How excited he is is that they are winning. Even full time saw him running on to the pitch to interrupt Kelly Cates and Gary Neville in the middle of their own post-match interviews as he attempted to take centre stage.

Contrast this to the erudite views, opinions and questioning of Neville (even when Manchester United are on). I’m sure Gary would like to remind us he used to play for a successful team and still follows them, but that’s not the job of being a commentator or a pundit. Likewise  quite wonderful Kelly, as the daughter of Kenny Dalglish, comes form a footballing pedigree that would more than entitle her to rave about Liverpool. Whilst you could understand her wanting to enjoy the moment, there was but nothing beyond consummate professionalism here. 

Look, I’m all for a bit of excitement and enthusiasm but have some class. Have some decorum. Know your audience. If nothing else, Jamie has played the game at the highest level and won some major honours. He’s been there and done it so knows what he is talking about.

Yet instead of this, it was almost like the early days of Beesplayer when from time to time they had to draft in the more excitable elements from the media team. Being able to write about a game isn’t the same as being able to talk about. Before Sky made the quite ridiculous decision to let Natalie Sawyer go, you could see her almost itching to reference the benefit to Brentford every time she was  involved in a game where one of our rivals was shooting themselves in the foot. Instead, she kept it classy. 

I’m sure Carragher has his fans. Good luck to them. And him. You can’t deny his passion but when it comes at the expense of proper analysis then doesn’t it kind of defeat the point? At least, for those of us who just want to enjoy a game of football. Perhaps it’s just me.

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The king and queen of Griffin Park commentary. Jamie could learn a thing or two

And finally, Matthew Benham. We all know our owner has a quite special means of using social media. He doesn’t say too much on Twitter these days but when he does, it’s always worth a look. As happened yesterday evening.

I’m not sure what else I can say, beyond this is quite magnificent. Only at Brentford……

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Nick Bruzon

To cap it all, they had a drum. A f***ing drum.

31 Mar

It really was that bad. Brentford and Wigan Athletic played out as insipid a 0-0 draw as one could imagine when Championship football returned on Saturday afternoon following the International break. The scintillating football which has been a trademark of Thomas Frank’s team in 2019 nothing but a distant memory in a game that was as awful as the smell wafting over the DW stadium. For the record, chicken manure from a local farmer – no manners, but what a critic. To borrow a phrase. Instead, it is nothing more than a case of scratching around for positives as the Bees are left chasing a fifth, successive top ten finish and a midweek trip to Swansea City. This before Frank Lampard’s Derby County ™ are next up at Griffin Park.

I’ve watched the highlights. If anything, the 1minute 47 seconds offered up by Sky are overly generous. The other 88 mins 13 were as turgid as it comes. Wigan were determined to strangle any life out of the game. Brentford, unable to find a way through as any attacking intent was choked out of the game. Paul Cook’s team administering a vice like grip around the throat of the Bees. Whenever Neal Maupay got in the box there were three men on him. Saïd was closed down every time he got on the ball. Several players seemed off the pace (first half Henrik and Ollie in particular – sorry, but..) whilst the team were desperately crying out for the fluidity of Romaine Sawyers to guide the ball through the midfield and open up play. And, Wigan had a drum. A f**king drum. At home. That was worse than anything we saw on pitch or smelled off it. At least we had Harry Potter up our sleeve to counter the moribund banging. Nice work, Simon.

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A lone drummer is no substitute for a home atmosphere

Instead, we ended the game with a solitary shot on target. According to the stats. I was struggling to remember even that although the highlights have duly offered it up. Our hosts had three, with Brentford very much grateful to Luke Daniels for keeping us in the match. Three times he retained parity including one effort from distance in the first half that looked as though it might catch him unawares and drift in to the top corner. Instead, it was guided to safety as our virgin goal remained unblemished.

Thomas was bang on the money at full time when he noted “It was a game of very few chances and I think it was a fair result.…. Our normal fluent play between the lines just wasn’t there and we weren’t good enough to play around them”. Not ideal reading but it was exactly what happened and infinitely better to have a head coach who acknowledges what we could all see rather than trotting out the usual “We deserved to win this”.

Look, it wasn’t great. There’s no real action of note to talk about and to compound matters, we lost Yoann Barbet just a few minutes into the second period. He’d needed treatment late on in the first after a nasty looking fall and was clearly limping as he emerged after his half time cuppa. The boos from the home supporters whilst he was being treated both unfair and uncalled for. Something that was consistent with any of our players going down after a lot of rough treatment.

There was little protection offered from the man in neon yellow, referee Andy Woolmer in a game that ended with him blowing up for fouls on 33 occasions. Just to put that into context, there were only 20 awarded as Birmingham City L went down at West Brom on Friday night and 21 as Frank Lampard’s Derby County came one short of hitting 7(seven) goal brackets against Rotherham.   

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View from the away end – about as close as it got

So Wigan stifled it. Brentford were off the pace. But can we take anything positive from this one? Well, the fact that Wigan played with such a negative style and formation shows the threat presented by normally free-scoring Bees. Indeed, as the clock moved on it felt like the sort of game that so many times in the past we’ve seen the team lose 1-0. At least this time around, Luke kept us in it with a number of saves that were as smart as the all red goalkeeper’s kit he was sporting. 

There was a return to match action for Lewis Macleod, too. His appearance as a late substitute for Josh Da Silva being the latest attempt to relaunch what should be such a promising career but one which has, sadly, been blighted by injury after injury. How unlucky has Lewis been? Here’s hoping he can put a few games under his belt and then hit the ground running next season. Indeed, even Josh starting this one and a very accomplished performance from Mads Bech Sörensen off the bench being further testament to a B-team system that is seeing players segue through to the match day squad.

What else. It was another game unbeaten in orange / brown (what jinx?) whilst the pub before and after the game was quiet magnificent – despite the bizarre formation of a canteen style queue to order the drinks. This a phenomena I’ve now witnessed twice in less than a week after having never experienced this previously. How has this been allowed to happen? Why? Did I miss a memo ? It’s quite bizarre.

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Wigan – great beer, despite the queue

The lack of social element aside,  how do you see the full contents on offer across the whole bar front when approaching a fixed point in the corner. Moreso, when you are staring at the back of the prior punter? Why can’t the staff work out who is next up without looking ? Even then, service was still granted by answering the question “Who’s next?”.  Err, me. I’m at the top of the queue. All that was needed was a plastic tray for the full school dining hall experience . Still, as an away fan it made an alternative to being greeted with the words ‘Ow Much..?’ from the previous transaction ringing in the ears.

We digress, as ever and that’s a rant for another day. For now, we’ll file it alongside waiters describing coffee as Expresso and made up coffee words (what the hell is a ventissimo?). Team GB. The faux-verb “To medal”. Mrs. Brown’s Boys. People who think Roger Moore shouldn’t top a ‘Best Bond’ list. Star Wars Day  – that’s the one after May the third.  Ian Moose. iPod headphones. The England Supporters band. Indeed, any form of musical interlude at football. See also: goal music, drums, Mr. Portsmouth and his bell. John Bishop (he’s from Liverpool, apparently. If only he’d mentioned it in his routine). Use of the words Derby County preceded by Frank Lampard’s….

And relax. All of a sudden, a 0-0 at Wigan doesn’t seem so bad. Despite the drum.

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Thomas salutes the fans at full time

Nick Bruzon  

Could Barnet serve up the final potato skin of a stunning fourth round?

28 Jan

Arsenal : out. West Ham : out. Everton : out. Tottenham : out. Wolves and Middlesbrough just about hanging in there. A weekend which has seen all manner of upsets and big names dumped on their backsides in the FA Cup comes to a frenzied denouement this evening as Brentford travel to Barnet for the final tie of the fourth round. Only Manchester City looked assured as they swept Burnley aside by five goals without reply. 

Tonight’s game is in equal measure just about as good a chance of progression as one could hope for (on paper) but also about as big a potato skin as could be lobbed under the feet of Thomas Frank. Just ask West Ham about that ! And please, stop sniggering. They did it win it back in 1980. A Trevor Brooking header, apparently. If only somebody had mentioned.

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Barnet represent a potato skin of the highest order

THE big question of course being whether Thomas will follow the fate of his predecessor Dean Smith and slip up on it or will safe transit to the fifth round be achieved for the first time in what feels like a long time? Brentford will be in the unusual position of knowing who we might be playing and where (subject to replays) before the Barnet game kicks off, given the draw takes place prior to kick off. We’re number 13 in that one, for the record. Wimbledon are 2, Manchester City 12 (oh to play them again), Manchester United 15 and Spurs are…out. 

Yet let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Whilst we may know who the potential opposition are going to be for this one, we still need to get past the current team in our way. Barnet will no doubt make it about as tough as they can with a full house roaring them on in a bid to make The Hive as intimidating as possible. 

Cripes, didn’t it work well for Wimbledon on Saturday. Facing a West Ham team who looked anything but up for it and playing like a beginner on FIFA 19, the higher ranked team were torn apart time and again before the goals started to flow. It was a quintessential example of playing the position rather than the situation and the Hammers came unstuck in quite glorious style. 

Brentford will be doing very well to learn the lessons from that one. You can bet that the press, BT Sport (who are showing this one live) and any neutral fan watching on TV will be desperate for a home win. Even if it is a non-Martin Allen year at Barnet. As noted at the top end, this one has the potential to see us left with as much egg on our face as those illustrious names to have already fallen this year. Just look at how Newport County took Leicester City part in the previous round to know that there is nothing guaranteed in football. No matter how lowly the other team may appear to be.

Even Frank Lampard’s Derby County (TM) were left hanging on during Saturday lunchtime’s game. That one was a classic cup tie played out on the proverbial quagmire of a pitch. Only some last gasp fouls and a cracking save from visiting ‘keeper Kelle Roos kept the Rams in the hat as they snuck through 1-0.

The point being that no matter how easy this one looks, it won’t be. The only thing that counts will be progression. Nobody will remember an unlucky loser when the fifth round kicks off in anger. Eyes will only be looking forward.

The FA Cup is that most incredible of tournaments. That most unique of formats. Think of all those combatants who have done battle through the preliminary rounds to bring us to the position we are now in. Their roles, perhaps, forgotten but pivotal to the rich tapestry of a competition which is still watched the world over.  Clubs and broadcasters may try to tinker with the format and the spirit of the tournament but at the end of the day (Clive) it boils down to a one off game of 11 v 11.

And I really can’t wait for this one.       

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Here’s hoping Brentford continue on the “Road to Wembley” .

Nick Bruzon

Fans guess who got the yellow and ‘Official’ look for a bigger boat. Twitter tears end the day nicely.

30 Dec

Birmingham City 0 Brentford 0. A draw on paper but a victory if social media were anything to go by. Which of course it isn’t in terms of points but is in terms of the moral high ground. As the Bees made it 3 unbeaten with a second successive draw on the road, it set up an intriguing New Years day visit from Norwich City on Tuesday. The Canaries themselves going down 4-3 to Frank Lampard’s Derby County (TM) as the Rams edged four points clear of the play-off chasing rivals and Norwich had to be content with ending the year in second place. It was a combination of results that set the Blues fans off the deep end in terms of post match reaction – whether the bottles that were allegedly thrown or a Twitter meltdown that very much belied their own belief that we’re ‘obsessed’ with them ! Please. No. I’m still laughing.

And laughter is the only reaction you can have. For a team that haven’t beaten Brentford since November 2016 and have failed twice more, again, this season you’d think they may learn to keep it zipped. But no. Instead it was the usual bitterness, tears, hissy fits, tantrums and belief that having a large stadium capacity is somehow akin to being deemed success. For a team that have finished below Brentford for the last four seasons perhaps by now they may have realised that size isn’t a guarantee of quality and matters infinitely less than what you do with it. But no.

There’s plenty out there. A quick search of #KRO or Birmingham amongst those terms to reveal the unintentional comedy gold that lets you know we’ve done a job on them. The marks down Neal Maupay’s back completely at odds with the claims of him being a ‘cheat’. I’m not going to give it the oxygen of publicity. If nothing else, they’re still rank amateurs compared to our good friend Simon C. Hateley of Aston Villa. If you need to rant, at least do it properly. They don’t even touch the sides compared to the Villa Park legend and it won’t take Sherlock Holmes to find the usual suspects out there. Moreso, given the responses from some of our own fans. And Brentford Official. Twitter was awash with feedback: 

‘The Chauffeur’ would note: I’m seeing Villa fans in a different light. Villa fans didn’t cry this much and Maupay  was actually bang out of order in that game. Generally proper fans of a genuinely big club who happen to share a city with w@nkers like Blues and Baggies.

Tony Cross was quick to chime in: I do love it when we annoy other clubs by not rolling over & letting them win ‘because that’s what history says should happen…’

Justin(LionsAndBees): But why are we so obsessed with them? Apparently.

Katie Bennett nails it this morning: Who wants to explain that leagues are point based and not attendance?

David Owen: The energy they put into telling us we’re irrelevant to them.

(That one had a ‘gif’ too).

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Yet, incredibly, if was Brentford ‘official’ who hit the jackpot. We’ve been quick to criticise the club’s use of Twitter in the past and you can never be reminded enough times about the horrors of #trophyfriends or #Novemberkings (amongst others). So imagine the surprise and pleasure at their reaction to a critique of the match report, which went :  

I haven’t read it but I imagine it just says – CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT, CHEAT.

All of which serves as a neat medium for bypassing the match itself. That Sky only have 58 seconds of highlights (here if you want them) probably tell you all you need to know. The Bees had the lion’s share of possessions and shots but, of course, that counts for naff all if you can’t put one away. Whilst we were never seriously troubled, Blues manager Garry Monk would claim afterwards that: “If anyone was going to look likely to get the win it was going to be us” .

There’s no surprise there. Birmingham City have dropped further ground in the promotion race at a time the fixtures are coming thick and fast. Derby County stretched the gap over the play-off wannabees as very late goals from Flo Jo (87) and Jack Marriott (90+inj) saw Norwich City undone at Carrow Road. 

As for Brentford, it’s three unbeaten and only one goal conceded in that period. Thomas Frank used his own press conference to comment how: “Defensively we were very solid and gave away zero chances. They created nothing and that is well done to the boys who have conceded far too many away goals in the past….I would say in general I think the match official needed to protect the key players in the game. You should see Neal’s (Maupay’s) back. There are scratches all the way down on his back.”

The BBC have more extracts from that one here.

The photograph that Neal posted Instantgram afterwards supported these claims. It made a mockery of the language being directed towards the ‘cheat’ (please, I’m STILL laughing) at full time. Yet whatever has gone before, all this has done is further embolden the fans with a positive frame of mind. If nothing else, the sour grapes from our opponents serving no better use than to act as a bonding catalyst for supporters who have heard it all before. Little Old Brentford. Punching above their weight. Tinpot. Tiny ground. Don’t deserve to be here.

You can keep it coming all day long. We love it. There’s no finer means of galvanising supporters than by making us laugh. Giving us the belief in our team. Genuinely, I LOVE playing the likes of Leeds United, Aston Villa and Birmingham City. Not because, “Ooohh – they’re ‘famous’ ” (please note: your definition of famous may vary) but because of the oh-so predictable reaction and under-estimating that we still get, even now, in our fifth season of Championship football.  Long may it continue – hopefully in the Premier League. Assuming, of course, Birmingham et al can get there too.

Bring on Norwich City. I can’t wait for this one.  

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Neal Maupay – ‘cheat’

Nick Bruzon

Football fans lost in the superunknown as Festive fixtures take hold.

28 Dec

Is it Friday? Saturday? Thursday? We’re in that dead-zone of the calendar where nothing makes any sense. A random televised game between West Ham and Southampton last night being the only clue that some half-arsed sort of normality is trying to be attained as the festive fixtures plough ever onwards. For Brentford, a 1-1 draw at Bristol City on, erm, let’s just call it Boxing Day for ease, saw The Bees make if 4 points out of 6 as our kamikaziesque tailspin was arrested and Thomas Frank pulled back hard on the rudder with his revamped team formation. i.e. he made us climb. But with a trip to play-off chasing Birmingham City (not a typo) next for Brentford will the return to more positive results continue ?

Fair dues to Garry Monk’s Blues. There’s no doubting we’ve enjoyed the lion’s share of points and jokes at the expense of Birmingham City on the pages over the last few years. How they swerved relegation to League One last campaign was a miracle akin to Christmas. There were the 7(seven) goals scored with none against. Four top ten finishes in the Championship for the Bees – each one above Garry Monk(/ insert name of previous incumbents) Blues. Then there was ‘that’ ten times better thing. 

Yes – I know Blues’ fans like to point it out as some form of ‘obsession’ every time it gets mentioned but football fans have long memories. As was written in the programme notes for Bolton, “The likes of Martin Rowlands, 10 times better Harlee and of course Mr. Moose’s own withering attacks on us have still not been forgotten.” . Even Dean Smith’s proclamation after his Aston Vila threw it away against Leeds United, causing him too declare that “From the celebrations, I thought they’d won the title” brought back found memories of Russell Slade after Leyton Orient had capitulated in that famous promotion clash six years ago. His own sour grapes are as much part of Griffin Park’s rich football folklore tapestry as the dog on the pitch, the hand grenade, badges being kissed or Mark Burridge exploding in the commentary box as Jota sliced through the Blackburn Rovers frontline… and midfield… and defence and goalkeeper… As magnificent as the time Stuart Dallas scored the best. goal. ever. at Craven Cottage.

View from the stand - Stuart Dallas celebrates doing that thing.....

Stuart Dallas – one of THE Brentford moments

And so the somewhat meandering point is that whilst Harlee will no doubt continue to warrant a mention from time to time, don’t think there’s anything ‘exclusive’ about it. Don’t think it’s any form of singling out a player or a club. A club who we’ve more than held our own against in recent times. It’s just one of the many comedy moments to have graced our footballing experience that will no doubt be mentioned again and again over the years.

Although I do so this time around with some trepidation. One can only acknowledge current form and results where Birmingham City are flying. They’re up to 7th (seventh) in the table and know that a win could see them leap-frog Frank Lampard’s Derby County (TM). Brentford, on the other hand…. Well, we all know what has happened since being named as joint favourites to win the Championship back in October alongside Leeds United. The bookies never get it wrong, supposedly. I’d imagine there were a few red faces at the Leo Vegas Christmas party this time around when reviewing that one.

Yet, yet, yet. Form can be temporary. Good or bad. The brakes are now on and the team set up has changed. We have the Championship’s leading scorer in Neal Maupay – a player who buried an absolute beauty at Bristol City. Mind you, it needed to be after the opening goal we conceded. A neon highlighter pen would have done a better job at being a a reliable marker as Eros Pisano was given all the time and room he needed to give the hosts an early lead. Just about the only positive to be taken from that one was that it wasn’t followed by a second within a few minutes – something else that has looked like becoming a trademark of our play in recent months. Instead, it was a case of start again and earn a hard fought point.

I take umbrage at Thomas’s post match assessment that “The header for Bristol City’s goal would have gone wide if it had not hit a defender and overall I thought we deserved to win the game”. We’ve done ur piece on ‘deserving’ many, many times over the years. It was a favourite of Dean Smith’s and a dangerous trap to fall into. Moreso, when ignoring the obvious shortcoming around the goal – every man and his dog could see that with all 11 players back in the box to defend a corner, allowing an opposition player to remain totally unmarked is nothing short of shambolic. Something that was also picked up on when  defending a free-kick at Hull City.

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Sky cameras caught how bad this one was

Still, the defence shortcomings have looked to be addressed. The switch to three centre backs to support the pressing full backs is one which has come at the same time as our switch in form. No bad thing either, given today’s game won’t be easy. By any stretch of the imagination. Garry Monk has his team eating up the table for fun and they are where they are on absolute merit. To make matters worse for us, Jota is back after injury lay off and whilst we all know he’ll look to cut in from the right wing, he is a luxury I’d still love to have available.

The bottom line is that going in to this one, Birmingham City are favourites. They’re the team on form. They’re the team gunning for promotion at present. They’re the team the bookies see as the one with most chance of picking up three points. If they do, it’ll be the first time since November 2016 that they’ve recorded a notch in the ‘W’ column when up abasing Brentford. 

That in itself will be reason alone to go for it once more. If Thomas Frank wanted to do anything to win over any doubters on the terrace, then three points on Saturday (I think) will be the perfect way to do it. 

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Feliz Navidad

Nick Bruzon

Here we go. Again. Cup shocks abound and potato skins await.

26 Sep

Could the big one be on? After a Tuesday night run of Carabao Cup shocks that saw Frank Lampard’s Derby County™ beat Manchester United, Burton overcome Burnley and QPR go down at Blackpool (please, stop sniggering) Wednesday night could see the biggest of them all. Is it just possible, if all the stars are aligned and the footballing gods are smiling, that Arsenal could beat Brentford? Stranger things have happened.

One thing’s for sure, if Manchester United came unstuck at home last night then it can happen to anyone. Fair play and hats off to Derby. Their own win over Brentford on Saturday being put all the more into context after a game which saw them go behind, come back and then concede the ultimate sucker punch – a 95thminute equaliser for the hosts after themselves going ahead on 85 – to take the game to a penalty shootout in which they eventually triumphed.

They’re the headlines. Nobody wants to get overly bogged down in pages of Mourinho misery or the family Lampard celebrating. That’s for those two teams to both enjoy. Right now the focus is, of course, on Brentford at Arsenal. Assuming Brentford can get to Arsenal with the Piccadilly line out of commission due to strike action – there goes that easy hop from West to North London.

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Have vodka bottle, will travel. Alternate travel to Highbury & Islington needed tonight

Still, the ghost of Bob Crow shouldn’t get in the way of what promises to be a special night. For Arsenal, a high pressure potato skin against Dean Smith’s hotly tipped Brentford side. Currently three points off the top of the Championship table and playing some quite wonderful football. Manager Unai Emery faced with the quandary of picking the reserves or risking the fitness of his more established names. Don’t forget that they’ve a game against top four Watford and then the excitement of a Europa League trip to FK Qarabag to follow this one.  

For Brentford, nothing to lose and everything to gain. With over 8,000 away tickets sold (and who knows how many more dotted around the stadium) it promises to be a vocal affair. Those stunning brown/orange shirts out in full force and not to mention a few faces from the past in the stands. The team, surely surely captained by Nico Yennaris, with a chance to prove how far they’ve really progressed. To see how worthy of all the praise that has been coming their way they actually are. Saturday’s result wasn’t great, that’s for sure, but if anything it’ll give Dean and his team even more incentive to prove what a blip it was with a chance to get back to winning ways in a consequence free environment.

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The Bees have been head and shoulders above most opponents this season

Excited? Yes. As much as anything it’s a chance for bonus midweek football and a visit to a new stadium. At least, with the Bees. A chance to see if we can carve out a famous victory. Blah, blah. Cliché, cliché. Yet perhaps as much as anything else, an opportunity to erase the painful memory of the anti-football we played at Chelsea in the fourth round of the 2016/17 FA Cup. A 4-0 defeat where we were lucky to get the proverbial nil.

There’s not much more to say, really. We all know the scoop and there’s only so many ways you can dress it up. Yet if tonight didn’t have you salivating already, there’s even more great news to follow. Football’s greatest competition (with all due respect to the Carabao Cup) is back. Saturday’s game at Reading sees the return of none other than….Centre Circle Challenge.

I should be fully focussed on Arsenal. Yet the prospect of seeing two supporters pinging balls from the corner flag to the heart of the meridian line, all soundtracked by Peter Gilham’s deadpan commentary, has me as excited as the trip to The Emirates. Almost. Brentford official has all the details including, most importantly, how you can enter this ultimate of fan participation events on the hallowed turf of Griffin Park.

All that’s to come. For now though, focus on whether we can emulate those famous League Cup nights against the likes of Hull City and Everton. Right down to the mascots…. 

Nick Bruzon